Monday Nights at the Rivoli

by Liz Heather in

All right, this’ll be a bit of an obvious post if you know me in real life. I’ve been going to see stand up on Mondays at the Rivoli in Toronto since I was 19 years old. That’s a long time, so that’s gotta mean SOMEthing. It’s a great room and I deeply suggest you go some time if you’re in the city. You can see the weekly lineup here. I’m keeping this short ‘cause you really just have to go to see how much fun it can be. I could go on to list amazing people who perform there often, but that would be excessive and the list would be too long and you’d be all, “Ugh, this list is too long. I’m not gonna click on any of these since there’s so many. I’m too busy. SO BUSY.” So I’ll just link this one lovely lady who can always make me laugh. Oh! And this beautiful specimen too, since he’s hosting tonight. 

Bath & Body Works - Foam Soaps

by Liz Heather in ,

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I first tried this soap when I got one as a gift from my friend Marla’s wedding shower. Since that time (it was April of 2012), I haven’t washed my hands with anything else. There are a billion flavors/scents and all of the ones I’ve tried are lovely. 

Plus, the foaming aspect makes it just a small delight in an otherwise grotesque room. They have seasonal ones as well, and they’re festive as hell. They usually have deals on how much they cost, depending on how many you purchase. I’ve even found some (same brand and all) cheaper ones at a few dollar stores if you look hard enough.

That’s the “Sea Island Cotton” scent up there. I mostly chose to show that one ‘cause of how ridiculous the name is. Ridiculous and so fun. 

SOAP!

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Read Alan Alda's Autobiographies (Yes, There Are Two)

by Liz Heather in

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It’s no secret that Alan Alda is great. If you don’t know who he is… then… man. Google it. It’s a sin that you don’t know already/I’m not about to waste time in here educating you. That man is wonderful. And these books of his are gems. GEMS! And keep in mind - I was only lukewarm on the ol’ Alda train before I read these, but after? Well, let’s not delve into the dreams I’ve had about him. 

Here are some of my favorite parts from the two books:

“It seems hard to believe you grew from that little baby… into a friend of mine.”

“I went out for a beer after class one evening with a fellow student. He looked down in his beer and said, “You know, if we really want to be first-class artists, we’ll have to give up everything. Everything. We’ll have to give up friends and movies and reading the Sunday Times.” I nodded and grunted in agreement. But inwardly I was thinking, “What the hell is he talking about? What kind of romantic bullshit is this?”

“And then he gave me, apart from not drifting while I talked, the only advice he ever gave me about acting. “Always find a place to sit down,” he said. “Your legs will get tired. Look for places to sit down. Whenever you can.” I nodded as if I understood. This is really strange advice, I thought. What could he possibly mean? Is he so empty that he thinks this is the secret of a life on the stage? I wish I could go back now and touch his hand. Touch his hand and thank him for sharing a speck of the reality of his life with me. Not the vague generality of most people’s advice, but a little bite of life: the ache in his leg on a long day. Anesthetized by youth, I missed it.”

These are just a few parts, but both books are definitely worth reading. Even if you miraculously DON’T love this man already.

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Trader Joe's Tea Tree Products

by Liz Heather in ,

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All right, I use all these guys. I’m not gonna go really deep into why they’re great to use, but here are a few tiny points:

  • they’re relatively inexpensive
  • I can understand every ingredient written on the back labels
  • smells amazing
  • it just feels cleaner than using other stuff from a drugstore

All right, that last point wasn’t terribly scientific. But honestly, the best part of using this stuff is when you leave it on for a little bit (I’m only speaking about the shampoo and the body wash right now) longer than you’re supposed to — there’s this tingling sensation that happens that just sort makes your shower seem more fun? If that makes any sense? If you’re intrigued by that statement, then perhaps you should just buy some (or visit me and try some) to see what I mean. 

If you’re in New York, you can obviously get them at Trader Joe’s and you can get them online at Amazon. Fantastic products. 

Why You Should Use Microsoft Entourage

by Liz Heather in ,

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All right, I have a lot of points on why you would benefit from Entourage. And because I happen to be in a numerical mood right now, off we go:

  1. Let me be clear: I only use this program for its Calendar feature. That is all. And it’s totally worth the purchase, even for only that one element.
  2. This is my backup system for remembering birthdays, anniversaries, vacations, holidays (I don’t mean Christmas, but moreso the kinds that don’t fall on the same day each year), six month check-up days, bill payment dates, the last time you backed up your laptop, appointments, death days (why is this important? I don’t know, but it gets written down ‘cause it feels important), etc. 
  3. You can set up specifically what kind of reminder you want for each event, ie. being reminded of something a minute before it happens or, say, a few days before, whatever. 
  4. A reminder box pops up and appears, no matter what window on your computer is open. This is amazing, in my opinion, because it lets me live my life a little easier without having to check my calendar constantly to see what I’m forgetting or missing. (Also, even having a reminder is optional.)
  5. Optional color co-ordination. Everything can (not must) be organized into categories like family, personal, recreation, work, etc. 
  6. You have a distinct record of what’s going on in your life past, present and future. 

The above photo is just an example of what it looks like, that one shown isn’t mine. Mine is much too precious for your curious little eyes.

I can’t really tell you how much I love using this guy. It’s way too organized, beautiful and I think you probably need it in your life. No pressure. 

Django Unchained

by Liz Heather in ,

Okay, I don’t really know where to start this. It was literally from about the halfway point that I began to loathe the whole movie. I didn’t think the whole thing was terrible, so I feel weird even saying “loathe”. Christoph Waltz was fantastic, he was the absolute best part of the entire thing. I really wish it were just all about him and Django was a smaller, side part or something. Also, Jamie Foxx was good. And Leonardo DiCaprio was whatever, really… just average, but that’s fine ‘cause that wasn’t what bothered me the most. Also, the music was phenomenal. I wanted to look up almost every single song that was played.

I think what irritated me the most was how awful most of the writing was. (Absolutely not the KKK/head cloth scene, that was so great.) As a whole, it just felt like this movie was the first draft of a film school dropout’s attempt at acclaim. Or better yet, a screenplay that was written by a tiny child who goes on and on and on with his never ending, boring-as-hell story – like a story that goes, “And then I went here. And then I did this. And then it was winter. And then this was what we did next. And then I became a bounty hunter.” UGH. So badly told and BORING and I’m sorry, but there was no back story at all to why I would give a shit AT ALL about Django specifically. Okay, yeah. He had a wife. He wanted to get her back. Okay… what the fuck else you got? That’s so fucking DRAB and tired that I lost interest almost immediately.

Also, I’m sorry, but any fucking NOTABLE/GOOD/RESPECTED director does not fucking make a longer-than-a-minute CAMEO in his/her own goddam movie. And I know that’s his thing. That’s what he does. But jesus christ. He’s not an actor. He’s never been one. Get out of the fucking movie. You’re not being “fun”, you’re coming off as an idiot who’s almost saying, “Yeah, this movie is a joke. So I’ll just stroll along here in one scene for fun.” That’s just a personal side note thing of things I hate, but that really pissed me off and always pisses me off in most of his movies. Get off the fucking screen and focus on improving your reprehensible script that you’ve somehow convinced everyone is so good.

I just feel like the whole movie didn’t have enough rewrites. Also, it just felt as if he didn’t care much to edit ANYthing. Obviously it was too long. So many fucking things could and should have been cut. And yeah this is maybe dumb/dense of me, but jesus fuck, I get that it’s supposed to be realistic to that time, but it felt so fucking weird to me to be almost comfortable hearing that n word after the billionth time it was said. At first, of course it’s just, you know, awful to hear, but literally after the fiftieth time, it almost became comfortable to hear because of overuse – and I don’t really care if that was the intent or not, I fucking hated it, the overuse of that, which seemed completely unnecessary to do in excess and a lazy excuse for trying to get an audience passionately against the obvious villains. I get what he was trying to do, but it just fell apart completely in execution. Again, that’s just my opinion. So, so disappointing. Of course there were a tiny, few good parts/things that I laughed at/liked, but as a whole… MAN. I’ll never want to see it again. And this sucks to feel ‘cause I can’t find anyone else who felt this way yet. Spike Lee doesn’t count, ‘cause Spike Lee can eat it since we each hated it for different reasons. 

Numerous people have called me a moron for not liking it, and that’s all well and fine. Even I was confused by my level of disdain at the end of this movie.