Can someone please make me a Nordstrom flagship store ambassador?

I truly love autumn weather, there’s just so much vest action. I couldn’t be happier. Here’s what went down last month!

The best tweets of the month can be found over here.
I finished up the Fall Fridays series because autumn ends in my brain November 1st.
I have friends who are kind of a big deal and I make appearances on their TikToks.

@thingsmyhusbandlikes These are so fun and easy to make! #holidaycocktail #holidayhostingtips #gincocktailrecipes ♬ original sound - Paul + Richard

Finally bought new nonstick pots and pans and IS THIS HOW EVERYONE IS LIVING? Had no idea this kind of kitchen ease was possible. My eggs are gliding in these babies, it’s almost sensual.
Loved Kaia Wine Bar on the Upper East Side. $8 martinis in 2023 is so unbelievable, I really should shut my mouth about it. I also tried birria tacos for the first time and lord almighty. Who wouldn’t want to dunk something delicious in something else delicious? Duck tacos were incredible, too.

I think these took off in popularity because someone smart decided not to call them “wet tacos”

I heard a great baking tip: make whipped cream fast in a food processor. So smart.
Experienced the awfulness that is Rolf’s German (Christmas) restaurant in the city. DO NOT GO. I let loose on a Google review and maybe that’s cold, but I had to, man.

A place this pretty has to be absolute trash.

Nathan was featured again in the New York Times recommending his Gramercy show (which he’s going to tape on February 5th), so that was huge. I’m becoming a regular at the framing place near my house and it’s wonderful.

So in love with the new Wegman’s in the city. I wish I could go back in time and tell kid Liz how much time she’d spend in grocery stores as an adult - she’d lose her little mind. There are just too many good deals at different grocers! I’ll never be above a good deal.
Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you already know how much I loved The Shark is Broken on Broadway. Best play I’ve seen in years. The Times critic Jesse Green is absolutely out of his mind for his review of it. (A deep dive of this man showed that he loved Shucked, so now I know he’s not the brightest.)
I made a pumpkin pie rice krispies fake pie because my dear friend Casey wanted one for Thanksgiving and it was cute as hell.

Vowing to get the Baskin-Robbins ice cream turkey cake next fake Thanksgiving. I did sample their Turkey Day Fixin’s flavour of the month and you know what? I respect it.
I saw too many outfit reels on Instagram and it altered my brain in thinking that I needed that one boring black, basic, long, “evening” coat that every white woman under 40 owns for every winter outfit so I bought the $50 one at Zara and returned it within two days. I’M NOT THAT WOMAN! Also that coat has the worst material, every single piece of lint in the air is attracted to it. Remember when Zara was good quality?
If you’ve ever used a Half Baked Harvest recipe, you might find this article interesting. The blogger apparently responded to the piece on Martha Stewart’s podcast, but I haven’t heard it yet.
Absolutely gutted that Duck Season is permanently closed! It had the only good poutine in this entire country. I’m not being dramatic.
So I’ve been doing this morning routine for about three weeks now and it’s wild how much happier it has made me. I wake up, make a spinach smoothie, walk Baby Dog, come home and eat an omelet and then open my email/look at my phone, etc. It’s been incredible. Also, not to overshare but I’ve also been drinking three liters of water each day and I don’t necessarily see a difference yet, but I do have an underlying better-than-you vibe that has been hard to shake off.
I don’t want to get you too excited but I am in possession of THE GLOOM ROOM. My overly generous friend Yassir got it for us and my life might now be complete? Words can’t express the beauty of this piece. (I couldn’t stop saying how “coveted” it is in the “miniature community” at fake Thanksgiving and I think it might have ended the party early?)
My wonderful friend Richard made stuffing as a main entree for a dinner at home and CAN WE MAKE THIS A THING? Genius idea.

You’re already Christmas shopping so just a gentle reminder: get the gift receipt.
The snow is coming and you will slip and possibly fall. Act accordingly.
I saw Priscilla in theatres and loved it. It was a little slow, but still great. I also bought the book it was based on, so that review is coming soon.

Some things I’m looking forward to this month: of course I’ll be lighting my bayberry candles on Christmas Eve as well as New Year’s Eve, December is always the most expensive month but it doesn’t have to be, don’t forget to buy your mistletoe, I’ll definitely watch some of these, I’ll absolutely watch The Snowman yet again and once again I’m begging you not to give lottery tickets as gifts.

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went on in October over here. And my autumn highlights on Instagram can be found here.

I fall down a lot. I’m not a moron, I just have poor eyesight and no depth perception. (Not being cute here, they’re seriously just bad eyes.) And since I’ve fallen down hundreds of times, I have some advice for you. Or rather, some things that you shouldn’t do when recovering from said fall.

Things Not To Do When You Fall

Completely act like nothing happened. People do this one a lot and it’s really funny to see. I never think the actual fall is funny, but people ignoring it makes me hysterical. It’s so weird to not acknowledge, and almost robotic.
Get mad. I don’t know who you think you’re mad at – maybe the sidewalk? Or the city for not fixing that step? Nope, it was you. You’re at fault. And if you’re mad about that, well, there are some deeper issues going on inside of you and you should maybe calm down a bit.
Cry. I’ve seen this twice before. From adult women. I’m pretty sure they were drunk, but still. Don’t do it. The attention you’re craving from this crying is massive and uninteresting to everyone around you.
Be embarrassed. Now, this is hard. I think after years of falls, I’m only beginning to adhere to this point. It’s extremely hard to fight off embarrassment in any situation. But honestly, one of the most unattractive sights alive is an embarrassed adult. Some people fawn over the embarrassed – I do not. This is not an emotion we should cater to. We all feel it sometimes, but you can’t give in to it and let it overtake you because it’s so stupid. Dumb things happen to everyone! We’re all idiots! Sometimes we accidentally walk into trees or walls. Deal with it with dignity at least. And witnessing a grown adult who’s red-faced with embarrassment? Ugh. Grossest sight you can see.

Things You Should Do When You Fall

Try to grab onto someone on your way down. You’ll either take them down with you (which is great always) or they’ll save your ass.
Smile immediately. It shows that you’re a human, with human emotions, and can take these things light-heartedly.
Laugh. Especially if you’re alone. It’s such a silly thing to happen to a grown person who knows how to walk, so you need to have a sense of humour about it. Also, if I saw a guy walking who tripped or fell and then started laughing about it? That man is a real man. He’s a human who isn’t so serious at all times.

What To Do When You See Someone Fall

Never laugh. This is the meanest thing to happen in life. (Okay, not actually the meanest, but in the top three.) This makes my heart fall to pieces when I see someone laughing at a stranger. Never do it. Such a dick move. Don’t do it.
Don’t say, “Whoa. That was bad.” Saying this offers nothing. I’ve heard this phrase maybe… five different times and it always hurts. I know it was bad. I don’t really want to talk about it right this moment. Even if I am smiling, I might be in pain. Also, I don’t know you. And I’ll never have a response for this sentiment.
Be concerned, but not overly concerned. There's a fine line between someone who doesn't give a shit at all and someone who overly wants to talk about it. Try to find the balance between the two and be that person.

Honestly, it’s harder to see someone fall than actually experience it yourself. Why is this? I think it’s because no one knows how to act when it happens to them. And most people are awkward as hell. It doesn’t have to be this way. I really think the worst thing you can do is just ignore it completely when it happens to you. Please stop doing that, everybody.

Edit Note: I know this is a long post. I apologize. I have very strong feelings on the matter and I couldn't condense it down. Won't happen again.

One last thing? These signs always make me giggle. Look at that little guy! Just great.

Navigating November 2023

When You Fall...