These smoke dealies make me very happy for some reason. Or whenever there’s smoke coming out of the sewer? UGH, SUCH SEXY IMAGERY.
It’s no secret that Alan Alda is great. If you don’t know who he is… then… man. Google it. It’s a sin that you don’t know already/I’m not about to waste time in here educating you. That man is wonderful. And these books of his are gems. GEMS! And keep in mind - I was only lukewarm on the ol’ Alda train before I read these, but after? Well, let’s not delve into the dreams I’ve had about him.
Here are some of my favorite parts from the two books:
“It seems hard to believe you grew from that little baby… into a friend of mine.”
“I went out for a beer after class one evening with a fellow student. He looked down in his beer and said, “You know, if we really want to be first-class artists, we’ll have to give up everything. Everything. We’ll have to give up friends and movies and reading the Sunday Times.” I nodded and grunted in agreement. But inwardly I was thinking, “What the hell is he talking about? What kind of romantic bullshit is this?”
“And then he gave me, apart from not drifting while I talked, the only advice he ever gave me about acting. “Always find a place to sit down,” he said. “Your legs will get tired. Look for places to sit down. Whenever you can.” I nodded as if I understood. This is really strange advice, I thought. What could he possibly mean? Is he so empty that he thinks this is the secret of a life on the stage? I wish I could go back now and touch his hand. Touch his hand and thank him for sharing a speck of the reality of his life with me. Not the vague generality of most people’s advice, but a little bite of life: the ache in his leg on a long day. Anesthetized by youth, I missed it.”
These are just a few parts, but both books are definitely worth reading. Even if you miraculously DON’T love this man already.
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“If your right foot itches, you’re supposed to bear the pain and do not scratch it, otherwise your good luck will fade away.
If your left foot itches, you should scratch it a lot to ward off bad fortune.”
All right, I use all these guys. I’m not gonna go really deep into why they’re great to use, but here are a few tiny points:
All right, that last point wasn’t terribly scientific. But honestly, the best part of using this stuff is when you leave it on for a little bit (I’m only speaking about the shampoo and the body wash right now) longer than you’re supposed to — there’s this tingling sensation that happens that just sort makes your shower seem more fun? If that makes any sense? If you’re intrigued by that statement, then perhaps you should just buy some (or visit me and try some) to see what I mean.
If you’re in New York, you can obviously get them at Trader Joe’s and you can get them online at Amazon. Fantastic products.
“I’m just gonna be myself when I get there, okay? I’m not gonna try to impress anybody.”
All right, I have a lot of points on why you would benefit from Entourage. And because I happen to be in a numerical mood right now, off we go:
The above photo is just an example of what it looks like, that one shown isn’t mine. Mine is much too precious for your curious little eyes.
I can’t really tell you how much I love using this guy. It’s way too organized, beautiful and I think you probably need it in your life. No pressure.
There will never be a greater moment in television history. I’m sorry. But that’s a damn fact.
“For what it’s worth, it’s never too late, or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit. Start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. And I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. And if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”
“Got a headache? Put some Vicks VapoRub on your forehead instead of taking an Aspirin. (Don’t use the no-name Vicks knockoff. That stuff is trash.)”