THIS is how much toothpaste you should be using. Stop filling up that whole brush!
In commercials, they fill up the whole brush 'cause they know you're a sucker who'll do as they do! Don't do it! Don't be that sucker!
“When you do something noble and beautiful and nobody noticed, do not be sad. For the sun every morning is a beautiful spectacle and yet most of the audience still sleeps.”
Will always love this clip. Makes my heart dance.
No, no, this isn't a post about the resurgence of this beautiful show (God, how I wish that were the case). Unfortunately, I doubt it'll ever air again with new episodes, but such is life.
If you've never heard of the show when it came out, here's a brief description: "To Catch a Predator is an American television series that features hidden camera investigations by the television newsmagazine program Dateline NBC. It was devoted to impersonating underage people (generally ages 12–15) and detaining male adults who contacted them over the Internet for sexual liaisons. People were lured to meet with a decoy under the pretense of sexual contact and then confronted." - Wikipedia
Why am I posting this? I don't know, maybe you're particularly bored on this fine Tuesday afternoon? You need some kind of escape from doing any work? You somehow forgot how amazing this show was?
Anyway, I hope you've seen these because as a lot of people already know: they're fantastic. I can't even really know why I feel that way, but I just love it. Once I start watching these on YouTube, well... my day slowly slips away from me since I can watch for hours.
Click here to watch the Fortson, Georgia episode. Or here for the Southern California one. There are many more that you can definitely find them on YouTube.
Two things about me?
I have been using/buying this makeup remover for about ten years now and I'm never gonna buy another brand. I can't. This dude costs $2 a bottle through Avon and lasts - oh, I don't know, ABOUT SIX MONTHS! By the by, do you have an Avon lady? Get one. She'll be talkative and lovely. Get one.
It's a creamy remover and maybe that seems gross, but you get used to it. It works amazingly and doesn't leave me shiny and glossy like a new penny.
Also, a tip? Wash your f-ing makeup off your face. Every night. You're not as tired as you think you are if you're already lying in your bed, trying to decide if you can muster enough energy to get up and wash that shit off. DO IT. I've been there, man. I know what it's like. It's so lazy and gross to admit how many times I used to not wash that off before bed, but I've been there. And I've grown. And so should you. (Especially if you wear mascara.) I have a feeling the 50 year old version of me is hanging out in some dimension going, "Yeah.. yeah... wash that stuff off! You're doing me such a solid right now." You ain't gonna be this young forever. Neither is that face of yours.
Anyway, this remover is wonderful. Try it out if you aren't already loyal to some great one that I've yet to hear about. It's $4 if you get it online, but if you get an Avon catalog, it'll be $2.
If this is for real, well, I'm pretty sure it'll change the world. How does this work? No idea. I got a 58 in grade nine science. But here's what I read about it:
"The Oilless Fryer is capable of cooking crisp, succulent fried food – all without the need for any oil. Just how is this “magic” achieved? Well, there is an infrared heating element that will be able to heat to 400° F, while an internal fan circulates the dry hot air in order to cook golden-brown fried food using 80% less fat than deep-fried foodstuffs. This particular Oilless Fryer is capable of handling chicken wings, french fries, or spring rolls without batting an eyelid, delivering the same crunchy exterior and moist interior that you will find by using conventional deep fryers. The thing is, is this capable of handling a high volume at any one time? That depends on the appetite of your guests, as it can cook up to four cups of french fries simultaneously."
$249.95 at Hammacher Schlemmer.
So much want.
“If you generally have nothing really to complain about, then leave those lucky pennies on the ground when you see them. Chances are someone else needs that luck more.”
EDIT NOTE: I don't follow, watch or understand anything about the NFL and nor do I care to.
That being said, The League is a fantastic show. Quick synopsis: "The series revolves around six friends who participate in a fantasy football league. The show follows the friends, who will do anything to win, while also dealing with a variety of situations that occur in their everyday lives." -Wikipedia
Why should you watch it? It's hilarious and perfect. How do you know if you'll like it? I don't know, genius - maybe watch an episode and see. I can't really think of any other show to compare it to, since good shows usually stand alone in their greatness. I first gave it a try 'cause I was on a silent Mark Duplass binge for awhile and wanted to see everything he's been apart of, and even after having gotten over that crush, this series still is in my top five of best stuff on television at the moment. (Other stuff on that list? The Mindy Project (I know he's on that show as well, but I swear I'm over him.), Community, Girls, Bob's Burgers.) Give it a watch!
Sidenote: Every single thing that Rafi (Jason Mantzoukas) has ever said on this show has been a gem, Lord love him. The fourth season starts Wednesday September 4th at 10:30pm.
What's that? You hate tennis? No, no you don't! You've just never gone to see a match, that's all. I assure you that you'll have a fun time. Please, though, do not pay over $40 for a ticket ever. Definitely don't go over that amount. Why not? Well, because it could get rained out and then you'll just be sitting there, like a sucker.
I went to the U.S. Open yesterday and saw a women's match before the rain started and screwed us out of the day-long tennis that I was anticipating. But thankfully, I got row Z tickets for a very cheap amount, so I wasn't too stung by the weather (if these tickets costed a lot, then man... I would have lost my mind). It was at the Arthur Ashe stadium in Queens (the biggest tennis stadium in the world!), which was impressive to see. (Is that a dumb thing to say? Seems dumb. Nevertheless, I was impressed.) And reading about it today, I learned that they will infact build a roof to that stadium, but not until 2016 at the earliest.
Anyway, the point of this post? Watch some tennis. Really. Just give it a try. Might like it. I, for sure, like it more than watching football. Maybe that sentence will make you scoff. Or maybe it'll plant the seed in your brain that tennis may actually be kind of great. I say this to someone once a week probably, but I'd really love it if I could be wicked at playing tennis myself. God, I'd be proud of that. But you know, my depth perception and all... ain't gonna happen.
Illustration by Andrew Hamm
Illustration by Andrew Hamm
