Fury of the Day - "...And Many More To Come!"

Celebrations are great. This thought is pretty universal, yes? Therefore, birthdays should be pretty great. My hope for the future is that as I age I continue to be:

• Cool with whatever age I'm at
• Only sad about not being "young" for a maximum of 24 hours
• Into getting gifts (I've seen a pattern of older people not wanting gifts as they age. I don't want to be that kind of grandma. Give me gifts.)
• Wicked as hell

It isn't my birthday soon, but I noticed something today that makes me so mad I had to mention it before I forget.

You know those people who wish you a happy birthday and then follow that with, "...and many more to come!" These people enrage the fuck out of me with that comment. Such a moronic thing to say to someone, especially on a day when maybe they're already not feeling the best. My questions for these cretins are as follows.

1. Are you saying this to someone who is older than you? 'Cause in that case, whoa. That's beyond rude. It sounds like you're wishing for them not to die QUITE so soon.  Is it just me who hears it that way? Am I wrong here? Such a dick thing to say. Why do you have to mention the future at all? Can't we focus on this birthday THAT IS HAPPENING NOW and leave it in peace? 

2. Are you saying this to someone younger than you? Well, that doesn't make any sense at all. And I've heard this said to a child before and the kid's face was all *what's-happening* after they heard it. Makes zero sense. When I've heard it from someone older, I always think, "Bitch, I should be saying this to your old ass."

3. Aren't we all wishing and hoping that WE'VE ALL got many more to come? Does this thought need to be expressed aloud? Should I thank you for saying it?! I HATE YOU.

The first time some idiot said this to me was when I was 23 and it confused the fuck out of me. Can we just strike this "wish" from all of our combined vocabularies? I feel like the people who say this sentiment are also the same people who tell me I “look tired”. Just crawl in a hole and die, you're the worst.

Some people will not understand this fury. You're sitting there in your cushy "apartment", thinking, "But Liz, they're just trying to say they hope you have a long and happy life! What's the problem?"

If that's you, then you've definitely said this to someone in the past and should be ashamed of yourself. Stop saying it. Hate it/you so much. 

xx

Slow Cooker Butter Chicken Recipe

 I am constantly forgetting about the existence of Indian food. I love it, but I guess since there aren't any Indian restaurants in my neighborhood, it's easy to forget. 

And keep in mind - butter chicken isn't even in my top three things that I like to order. But this butter chicken? Get the hell out of here.

I know I won't shut up about you getting a slow cooker, I'm sorry. But whether you cook a lot (oh man, you need one in that case) or you never really cook at all (ugh, you especially need to get one because it'll make you want to cook all the time) - this is one of the best chicken recipes I've ever had.

Easy Healthier Crockpot Butter Chicken

Prep Time: 10 minutes

Cook Time: 5 hours

Total Time: 5 hours

Serving Size: 4

Ingredients

1 pound boneless skinless chicken breast, cut into bite size chunks
1/2 onion, finely minced
2 tablespoons butter (butter is totally optional, I opt to use none since I really don't think it makes a difference, taste-wise)
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 tablespoon freshly grated ginger
2 teaspoons curry powder
2 teaspoons curry paste
1 teaspoon turmeric
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 (6 ounce) can tomato paste
1 (14 ounce) can coconut milk
1/2 cup fat-free greek yogurt
1/4 cup half and half
cooked white/brown rice, for serving (I used brown rice 'cause it makes me feel better about my choices.)
Fresh homemade Naan, for scooping (homemade? I don't think so. I bought whole wheat pizza crust instead.)
 
Instructions

"In a large glass measuring cup or bowl mix together the coconut milk, greek yogurt and cream. Stir in the tomato paste, garlic, ginger and all the spices. Mix well.
Spray the inside of your crockpot bowl with cooking spray or grease with olive oil. To the bowl sprinkle the onion over the bottom. Add the chicken and then pour the coconut milk mixture over the chicken so the chicken is completely covered. Add the butter and place the lid on the crockpot. Cook on high for 4 hours or on low for 6 to 8 hours. I like to stir mine once or twice during cooking, but it is not necessary. When ready to serve taste and season with salt and pepper if desired. Serve over rice with a big piece of fresh Naan."

Original recipe found at Half Baked Harvest.

“Every home needs a slow cooker. Get one.”

— #lizadvice

Faux Fur from Aritzia

Stole (noun): a woman's long scarf or shawl, esp. fur or similar material, worn loosely over the shoulders.

All right, now that you know what it is (and really, you should've known already) - make your world eons more glamourous and GO BUY ONE! I'd only heard of their existence a few years ago when my friend Marla had one and I immediately scoured the streets for one to call my own. This one specifically feels more amazing than it should considering that it's faux mink.

I bought this exact one in brown last winter and never used it. Why not? I didn't think I was money enough to wear one at that time. Clearly I was, since I had purchased it, but I just couldn't bring myself to wear it in public. 

This winter however? I'm being showcased on all around town in it. I literally will not leave home without it. I really want to buy the one in white, but I'm waiting until the end of the season when hopefully it'll be cheaper. 

So fucking soft and pretty.

Hot Chocolate Variety Pack

I can't tell you how delicious this stuff is. Obviously I went for the Coffee Crisp first, which was amazing. But then the After Eight one happened and my head exploded. So I'll assume I'll be too dead to write about how good the Rolo one turns out to be.

You can buy this variety pack at most grocery stores in Ontario - I found it at the Metro near my parent's house in Mississauga. SO GOOD.

Thank You

Just so we're clear, I am grateful to you.

I know that sentence isn't enough - and that thought makes me so mad. I want to express so hard to you just how much it means to me that you would ever want to read any of these words or posts or anything that I've put up on this site over this past year. Any of it - the stuff you've liked and especially the stuff where you've been all "Meh, not my thing," 'cause you still came back to see what else I got - and for that? Man. That's really fucking nice - and I thank you from the pit of stomach. I don't think you realize how kind it is and how much I bask in knowing that even one person gave a shit about anything written here. We're all busy and we all have a million things to do, and this blog has been one of my major things to try and maintain this year because it's brought me a great deal of happiness to try and do. And it makes me fucking blush to think of anyone smiling for a millisecond because of something he/she has read on here. 

Andrew Hamm, I'm especially thankful for you and your Mom Says illustrations each week. They are my favourite part of the site. Just to clue the rest of you in, Andrew drew this first Mom Says and sent it to me as a gift just because he wanted to. And obviously, I loved it. Who wouldn't? And when I selfishly asked if he could keep doing them each week, he agreed and here we are. This man has more important things to do, but still does these for me and he's incredible for it. What kind of person receives a gift and then responds with, "Man, this gift is amazing. But you know what would be greater? If you continued to gift me with things just like this one EVERY SINGLE WEEK into the foreseeable future. Thanks." That's essentially what I said to him. One day he'll get sick of doing them and stop because that's what a sane person would do and I'll still be thankful for all this hard work. Andrew, you're the best.

I want to hug all of you.

Yours,

Liz

New Year's Day Checklist

The following things must be done on New Year's Day to ensure a prosperous year ahead:

1. Wear red. This brings luck.
2. Nothing should leave your house - so don't take out the garbage today - because if things leave, then that means things will be leaving you all year.
3. Don't do your laundry or wash your dishes or wash your hair because you'll wash away luck. And don't you dare sweep at all.
4. Don't use scissors today or they will cut off your good fortune.
5. Good Foods To Eat:
   • Incorporate some black eyed peas into one or all of your meals today. When eaten today, they bring enormous good luck. 
   • Lentil soup because lentils resemble coins.
   • Pork because poultry scratches backwards, a cow stands still, but a pig roots forward, ergo those who dine upon pork will be moving forward in the new year.
   • Chicken should not be eaten on the first day of the year or you will have financial difficulties for the rest of the year.
   • Any greens such as collard greens, peas, chard, cabbage, kale, spinach, broccoli, etc. (because the greens resemble money).
   • Eating cornbread is supposed to bring wealth.
   • Some good recipes can be found here.
6. Wearing new clothes today (especially socks and underwear) is extremely lucky.
7. Do not lend any money to anyone today or you'll be giving away all your money throughout the year. And try not to spend any money as well.
8. Avoid breaking anything today or crying. Again, what you do today sets the tone for your coming year.
9. Keep this in mind: Anything shaped like a ring is believed to be good luck because it symbolizes “coming full circle,” completing a year’s cycle.
10. Sleep in a bed with clean, new sheets.

So basically - whatever you do today will set the tone for your year. So sleeping in all day is obviously not the best idea since you'll have a lazy year ahead. Some ideas of things to do today for a good year?

• Phone friends of family
• Dance
• Be friendly and polite, more than usual
• Exercising, even in some small way
• Do a small amount of work, but don't go overboard
• Compliment someone

Am I ridiculous for suggesting these things to you? That's your call. I'm a firm believer in this kind of stuff and I'm also fortunate enough to feel a great deal of happiness in my life so I'll continue on with adhering to things like this. 

Happy New Year!

“What if you didn’t run? This one time. What if you stayed, and let love overtake you?”

— Josh Bennett

Auld Lang Syne

This song will forever make me teary. I don't know why. I want to say because it's so beautiful. It's definitely been on some of my breakup playlists over the years, just to help induce any sadness. Just love it.