“Maturing is realizing how many things don’t require your comment.”

— Rachel Wolchin

Read Hard - Book Blog

I feel like we all wish we read more. Am I right in thinking that? The moment you become an adult there's this impalpable pressure that's suddenly placed upon you to be so fucking well read, it's an exhausting expectation. That being said, I'm always impressed by people who read a ton and will forever love that trait in a person.

I will never be well read. That's just a fact I've come to deal with, which is fine. I mean, I read - but maybe only five or six books a year (and that's considered a good year). (One time I read three books in four days and I feel like that sentence may be my final words someday I'm still so proud of it.) Anyway, it's all right to assume that you probably read more than I do. And if that is true, and you give any kind of a shit about getting actual GOOD book recommendations on what to read next, then this blog (Read Hard) is for you. 

The lovely woman who writes it is my dear friend Adele and she writes exactly how she speaks, which I think is rare and just the best. She just started it earlier this month and it's about goddam time.

Rockaway Taco

There are two things you need to be happy: beaches and tacos. So when there's a place that you can go where you can dine on BEACH TACOS, I will likely suggest you go there as I just did this past weekend. 

And if you do make the trek to Rockaway (which really isn't that far at all from the city), please get the fish tacos. I was a little disappointed when I realized they're deep-fried fish tacos and not, like, California kinda fish tacos - but they're still really tasty. And the Mexican corn? Get the hell out of here, I could've eaten five of those. Definitely the best thing on the menu. Also note that the chorizo tacos are nothing to write home about. 

Would this place be as popular if it were in Manhattan? Crazy doubt it. But since it's in the middle of nowhere amongst (mostly gross) beach-type food, it makes sense why people are so into this place. 

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Fish tacos

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Corn heaven

The Pet High Chair

“Satisfying a mutual desire for companionship, this high chair permits your dog or cat to accompany you at the dinner table. The high chair clips securely to tables up to 2” thick and its height adjusts without tools to elevate your pet to near eye level. It has a frame of powder-coated 5/8” steel tubing and its arms are rubber-coated so they will not mar table surfaces. By providing an alternative to sitting on your lap, running disruptively underfoot, or outright banishment, the chair assuages a pet (and its owner’s) frustration, and promotes more refined behavior. The chair’s 600-denier tan/brown nylon fabric cleans easily. Two tethers on the chair protect your dinner guests against any lapses in etiquette. Folds for convenient storage and travel. For pets up to 10 lbs.”

— Hammacher Schlemmer

The people who brought you the dog umbrella are now touting this contraption. Am I writing a post about this item because I think it's ridiculous or because I think it's amazing? Honestly, I don't even know anymore. I used to think that I'd never be the type of person to carry a tiny dog in a purse before either and that's now a reality, so WHO KNOWS. I can say for sure that I wouldn't buy this high chair solely because I don't run with an eat-food-at-the-dinner-table kind of crowd. But if I did? Man, this might have to get bought. LOOK AT HIS LITTLE FACE.

Also, don't judge me for carrying a dog in a bag because:

1. I don't like the idea of tying her up outside a grocery store and leaving her alone since that seems kind of mean and also SHE'S GORGEOUS AND SOMEONE WILL TAKE HER.
2. She likes the air conditioning that she gets to experience inside said grocery store.
3. I do not do it for fashion, I do it for necessity. If we're outside, she's walking on her tiny paws, always.

Edison's Ghost Machine

Words can't express how incredibly proud I am to know and love the woman, Jennifer Faylor, who penned this book of poetry. I've spoken of her before and I likely will again.

I had the pleasure of previewing Edison's Ghost Machine a few months ago and was startled by the fact that I think I may actually consider myself a poetry fan now. Who knew it could happen? Not only is it beautifully written and memorably poignant - but if you and I have any similar tastes at all, then you'll absolutely feel as strongly as I do about it.

A full review of this book will be the subject of a future post - I'm only mentioning it to you now since it recently became published and available for your fine eyes. You can get a copy on Amazon and there's no reason in hell you shouldn't read it.

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“Keep dryer sheets in your running shoes when you’re not wearing them. And if you’re thinking, “I don’t need to do that, I don’t use my sneakers that much,” then you should probably *start* using those running shoes more since you’re not exercising enough.”

— #lizadvice

The Mindy Project Fashion

You're already aware that I can't say enough good things about Mindy Kaling. One thing that I haven't commented on before, though, has been her wardrobe on The Mindy Project. Everything she wears is so goddam colourful and full of life - it's refreshing as hell. I can't think of any other character on a television show whose wardrobe is so memorably unique (other than maybe Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory - and it irks me to even admit to watching that show, still). 

Ignoring the fact that she doesn't show as much cleavage as I would prefer, I love every choice that she/her wardrobe department has made. I just came across this site that gives you information on almost everything she's ever worn on it, incase you were wanting to seek out any of the pieces and wear them yourself. 

Baseball Glove Scented Soap

Pretty self-explanatory title up there. Who would buy this, you ask? I'll assume anyone who grew up playing baseball (or, in my case, grew up around a sibling who played). I never had any real skills when it came to sports (even before my eye issues), so I was limited to pretend-playing in my backyard. I definitely remember the smell of gloves like this, so I'd definitely use this soap once or twice. I doubt that it would dominate my bathing routine since I'm not a maniac - but a one time use every so often to be gently reminded of a simpler time? Sure.

Shower From Below

If I'm ever lucky enough to live near a beach while simultaneously having access to oodles of money, I'm getting this. You hook it up to a hose and step onto it to get rained on from the ground up. All you need to do is step into it and your body weight makes the Viteo’s shower jets turn on, so water gushes up from below and over your head.

Is it worth $850? In my parsimonious opinion, fuck no. But I guess it's that expensive 'cause of the body weight sensor - and I suppose that kind of technology warrants the high price. I'd be just as happy with a little switch to turn it on in exchange for it to be a bit cheaper, but I suppose that's just peasant-talk.