January Jewels

by Liz Heather in , , , , ,

Forgive the lateness of this post! Here are the highlights from January.

  • Still using the Origins GinZing Eye Cream and I think it’s working, so I’ll keep at it. It doesn’t leave those red circles under my eyes (that other eye creams have done to me) when I’m using it either, which is a huge plus.

  • I can’t remember if I’ve ever mentioned how good this ArtNaturals shampoo & conditioner is for hair growth. I’ve been using it for a few months and it obviously takes a bit to start working, but it definitely does. I’ve also tried their Himalayan salt scrub, which is also pretty great.

  • Again, I’m not sure I’ve ever mentioned it, but I’ve been in love with this perfect tinted moisturizer from AmorePacific for about a year now. I know that it’s too expensive, but I really try to make it last at least a year to make it worth it.

  • Nobody told me how good orzo is! I may have told Nathan it’s a kind of rice so that we can continue to eat it regularly?

  • I watched about three or four episodes of Tidying Up with Marie Kondo since every person on the planet did as well, and I think I’m good and don’t need to watch more. Although I did see this one Buzzfeed post about actually helpful insights from her whole deal.

  • Did you know that if you have an iPhone, you can literally shake it to undo typing? Layla just taught me that, so great.

  • I tried the burger at Beebe’s and it was good! Especially if you’re in the mood for something quick & tasty.

Burger at Beebe’s in LIC

  • Read & loved Busy Philipp’s new book.

  • Sampled some of the donuts at Dough and… oh man. Too doughy! I know, don’t kill me. And there were barely any poppy seeds on a supposed “lemon poppy seed donut.” Go home!

  • I’ve been using Kiehl’s Buttermask For Lips for a few weeks and even though it’s pretty decent, I think the Laneige Lip Mask is a slightly better product in terms of how soft it makes your lips in the morning.

  • Finally ate at Emily in the West Village. Didn’t realize they took over the old Blue Ribbon location, it’s such a beautifully small spot. The food was fantastic, it’s still unclear to me what exactly a Detroit-style pizza is, but it’s lovely and weird and so good. The burger was great too, just definitely not worth $27, that’s insanity for meat on a bun, I’m sorry.

  • Oh! I tried this awful salmon recipe off of Half Baked Harvest, which usually has amazing recipes. I kind of like that that woman isn’t perfect now.

  • Had the best hot chocolate of the season so far at Boro Hotel.

  • My friend Dave Merheje has a stand-up special on Netflix that is crazy good and he’s the best and you have to watch it.

  • So I’m all caught up on This Is Us and man. It’s a lot. When William told Randall, “Take me to meet your father” and he starts talking to Jack at the tree? I haven’t cried that much at a scene since Tom Hanks lost Wilson. Good christ. I think one of the best parts about this show is that it covers all the years of a life of someone and I feel like no show has tried to do that, it’s so crazy good at times.

  • Tell me you’ve seen the Futurama episode Jurassic Bark about Fry’s dog. I wept.

  • I’ve been hearing about Xi’an Famous Foods forever, so I made it over there and ate the spicy lamb cumin noodles, which was huge and really good, definitely enough for two people. It was super spicy and the lamb was incredible.

  • Finally tried Smith & Cult nail polishes and they last a pretty decent amount of time. In love with the colours Stockholm Syndrome & Doe My Dear.

  • Also in love with Cara Cara oranges. Find them. Eat them. Love them.

  • There’s this wicked new pizza place in my neighborhood, Massa’s, which definitely has a hint of what is so good about Patsy’s in the city.

  • Obviously I watched both Fyre Festival documentaries because none of us are individuals in this age and while the Hulu one was good for showing the terrible-ness of the financial specifics, and the Netflix one was good for showing the bigger picture of what a scumbag he is and the specifics of people who were screwed over - BOTH really were the same fucking movie. Dick guy. Dick advertising company. Dicks all ‘round.

  • I’ve been watching this 100 Baby Sims Challenge (a new one comes out each week roughly) and they’re so addictive to watch. I don’t even feel the urge to play, it’s weirdly enjoyable just to watch.

  • Watched the Ted Bundy tapes and after seeing the whole “series” on Netflix, I’m officially on board with the death penalty. I used to be against it more or less, but definitely on board with it now. Another thing? I can’t watch these types of series anymore. Not because they’re too horrific to think about or because they’re such awful crimes (they are, both of those things), but it’s infuriating to watch these pieces that treat these vile human beings with such dignity, who are thoughtfully studied and analyzed while each victim simply has a name, a photo and how she was brutally murdered… and that’s it. It’s demoralizing to everyone who suffered as a result of those crimes and disgusting that these despicable men are treated as celebrities with any kind of rights. It’s sick.

  • Tried Cadbury’s Royal Dark Chocolate and I swear it doesn’t even taste like dark chocolate, it’s so good. It’s like what all other dark chocolate WISHES it tasted like.

  • Went to Tavern On The Green in Central Park for the first time! This place will forever remind me of Ghostbusters, it’s amazing that it’s even still around. The service was great, the light inside the place is so bright and lovely, the food was fairly average, but I am glad I went.

  • Finally ate at The Dutch (somewhere I’ve wanted to try for years) and it was perfect. Look, I have a soft spot for steak tartare and their wagyu one was phenomenal. Even the jalapeño cornbread with whipped butter that comes before the food was amazing. Although bad cornbread is hard to find. The kale Caesar wasn’t anything to write home about, but that’s okay. The service was stellar and the hostess even said, “Goodbye Ms. Heather!” on my way out, which I loved. I will definitely be back here.

Wagyu Steak Tartare at The Dutch

  • I made two new recipes from Chrissy Teigen’s second cookbook: the salted maple granola and the cheesy spicy breakfast hash. Both were crazy good! Some notes: ignore the microwave instruction on the hash. And lessen the granola ingredient amounts unless you want to be eating this granola for a year (it also tastes amazing unbaked).

  • I returned to Augustine inside The Beekman for Restaurant Week for lunch and even though it was day 1 of having the flu, the food (that I ended up taking home) was delicious. A decent steak tartare and a roast chicken that would put all others to shame.

  • I was in Starbucks on my laptop recently and since I forgot my headphones, I had to listen to the Hamilton soundtrack that they had on for at least an hour. Aaaaannnndddd I feel like you know where I’m going with this. Hamilton sounds like it fucking suuuuhuuuucks. I promise I’m not just hating for the sake of hating something successful. It actually sucked hard. I can’t imagine sitting through the actual performance, good god the patience you’d have to have.

  • Read The War of Art upon Nathan’s insistence.

  • So excited for the Big Mouth Valentine’s special next week.

(If you have any interest in past monthly roundups, they can be found here: December 2018, November 2018, October 2018, September 2018, August 2018, July 2018, June 2018 & May 2018.)

The Hot Chocolate at City Bakery

by Liz Heather in

All I can say about the hot chocolate at City Bakery is this:

It's one of the most horrendous drinks you'll ever have the displeasure of putting into your body. The taste will linger within you for hours. Even if you get the small!

If you're wondering why I'm narrowing in on such a seemingly insignificant seasonal item in such a large city, well, you obviously haven't had to listen to the masses upon masses declare this concoction as the "city's greatest hot chocolate." I've heard that statement for years now and finally tried it for myself yesterday. Here are the reasons it ruined my day.

  1. A small sized cup costs $5. That's five American dollars. (And if you wanted a housemade marshmallow* - that would be an extra $2.) 

    *A housemade marshmallow? Are you fucking kidding me? I'm not six. I will never want that. And if you're an adult who wants a housemade marshmallow? You need to reassess your entire life. You either have too much money and/or questionable eating habits. Either way, figure it out.

  2. I literally drank 1/4 of the whole cup and felt sick to my stomach. And I didn't even gulp it down! Drinking that 1/4 took me twenty minutes! I had to take breaks! Breaks that, ultimately, made me angrier and angrier that I'd wasted good money on this agony.
  3. What's so terrible tasting about it? IT'S LIQUID FUCKING CHOCOLATE. It tastes as though there's no water or milk or anything in that cup! It's 150% sweetness. And not the good kind of sweetness. Listen, I love chocolate. It's my second favourite thing to eat. But this was unholy - and not the good kind of unholy.
  4. I was thinking about who would possibly enjoy this drink - and came up with the answer that it would have to be children. Children make terrible decisions, food-wise. It must solely be for them. But then I thought that no child could afford $5 for a mere beverage. Maybe an NYC-raised child, sure, but that's another issue of its own. So does this drink only exist for parent-tourists who'll pay anything for something their kid wants? It has to. And if that's the case? Fuck you, City Bakery. That's garbage. I'm never a fan of gouging tourists.
  5. Look, I know I hate this drink. And I know it's too expensive. And I know I threw it out when it was 3/4 full. But LOOK at how small it actually is. (See below). For that kind of money, shouldn't I get something a little more human sized?! Yes, I know I'm complaining that they shouldn't be selling them at all, but since they are - can they get a little more decent with the cup size? C'mon! 

Liquid hell, size small

Please never try this hot chocolate for two reasons: 1) If you try it and hate it, you'll regret losing that $5 and 2) If you try it and love it, there are way deeper issues going on inside of you that need to be addressed and treated.

(And if you didn't know my first favourite thing to eat is fries - well, that's disappointing 'cause you should know me by now. I know it doesn't make a lot of sense to bash a hot chocolate and then boast about the beauty of french fries, but I'm a complex woman.)