Makeup Tip of the Day

If you give any kind of a shit about  makeup and you're not doing this already - start. If you never want to hear the phrase, "Woah, you look tired again," then this maneuver is heavenly. 

(Also, if you're a mutant who say things like that? Man. You're really the worst. I mean that sincerely. It's one of the silliest things you can say to another adult. Absolutely moronic.)

I guess you could use a white powder, but that might be too loosey-goosey. I use the $5 white eyeliner pencil (it's less pencil-y, more gel-like) from Sephora's own collection.

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You can find it along that horrible look-at-these-products-while-you-wait-to-leave line before you buy something. 

Sephora Collection 4-Step Nail Buffer

Everyone should have this in their bathroom cabinet. Everyone meaning men, too. There's nothing more annoying than when a man doesn't own any nail-fixing devices. Do they NEVER get chipped nails?! Of course those idiots do! ALL us idiots do! But I get it. They don't care about their nails - but they should. I don't want no jagged-ass man nails running their fingers through my hair! File that shit down.

Anyway, this small 4-step buffer is perfect in every way. It files, buffs, polishes and shines (with a numbered system that reminds you what order to do it in). What's the difference between polishing and shining? No idea. But when you're finished, your nails look spectacular. You know how sometimes when you do your own nails you get bumps underneath the polish? Well, that'll happen NO MORE if you use this guy. Love it so much. It comes singularly, but I got the 3-pack so I can keep one in my purse at all times, one at my boyfriend's and one at home. 

e.l.f. Lip Exfoliator

This is the best thing I've tried at e.l.f. thus far. I can definitely see why so many people are loyal to this little guy. I don't wear lipstick often, but I still use this every morning and night. I'm not sure if this is supposed to happen, but little bits of the exfoliator come off the stick and onto your lips in a way that makes it feel like it's really working and doing something. And if you use this exfoliator and then follow with some peppermint extract? You're going to feel indestructible. Please try that combination now.

And if you're into any kind of plumping lip agent/gloss/shine/whatever... you need to stop using that nonsense immediately and bring out the real, natural plump that's already in your lips. I swear to God it's there. Exfoliating them brings out that plump. Look it up.

This seems like a lot of lip maintenance, I know. But I can't tell you what a difference you'll see.

I'm not even going to dwell on the fact that this is only $3. You have no excuse to not get this.

The Signature Facial at Metamorphosis Day Spa in NYC

If you take part in only one self-servicing, luxurious act this week/month/year/what-have-you, then please arrange to have this facial. 

I have taken part in a lifetime total of three facials in my twenty-eight years, and this last one makes me want to re-adjust all of my current priorities. The fact that it's a ninety-minute facial was the first thing I loved about it since, well, that's a long time. And when things take a long time, they're usually worth doing. And in that time, some crazy peels, masks and other unworldly things took place. What "unworldly" thing am I talking about? Um, I don't know - THE EXTRACTIONS! Do you, simple human, know what that means? Because, at the time, I did not. And it soon became my favourite part.

“An extraction is the process of clearing a clogged or compacted pore by manual or mechanical means. Extractions are often performed as part of a facial. Most people need at least a couple of extractions during each facial, though you may require more extractions if this is your first facial.”

— http://www.ascpskincare.com/media/consumer_education_extractions.php

(Imagine there were photos here of my extractions being done? I don't know if you and me are quite there yet, but just know that I was thinking about it. Would've been gross and beautiful somehow at the same, I think.)

Anyway, it was best part of the facial. A trained professional? Handling my pimps? In a neat-ass way with high-tech equipment? UM, that's amazing. The whole experience was phenomenal and I will definitely go back for another. 

Gross Confession of the Day

This will be a new segment where I will divulge one of my gross personal habits. I’m pretty judgemental about the things I tell you to do and like, I realize - so to balance that out, I figured this would be a welcome addition and reminder of the fact that I’m just as gross as everyone else.

Confession #1:
I don’t wash my bras. I think I’ve washed maybe four bras in my entire life. And each time I did it - it took FOREVER ‘cause I did it in the sink, so that’s pretty much why I refuse to do it again. Too time consuming, can’t be bothered. (This does not include sports bras, I’m not a mutant.)

(I was about to lie to you and go, “Oh, but it’s no big deal ‘cause I buy a billion bras and throw them away so often, so it doesn’t make a difference!” but I stopped myself. Because I value you and you deserve to hear an honest account of my repugnant behaviour.)

(Confession #2 can be found over here.)

Long Hair Ponytail Trick Via Pinterest

One of my New Year's resolutions was to actually try at least two Pinterest pins a month. (Does that seem like I'm aiming pretty low with only doing two? I think it does, but two is better than my usual one-a-year.)

Anyway, I just tried this one and I loved it. Also, it ups my hairstyles-to-leave-the-house-in quota to a whopping THREE HAIRDOS. So that's big news, guys. You should try the hell out of this because it makes you look goddess-like. 

Sidenote: I am in no way saying that this hairstyle made me look like a goddess. I've looked like a goddess for many years now.

Tip of the Day - Perfectly Lined Eye Shadow

Tip of the day: use scotch tape to have a perfectly even eye shadowed area on both eyes. Love this.

“Tiny, crumbled up pieces of garlic bread taste amazing on pasta. Do it.”

— #lizadvice

Duo Lash Glue

This product? Pure trash. Don't be fooled into thinking it's good just because Sephora endorses it. Don't!

If you're using this glue, you're going to hate putting on false lashes. I've been using it for a few weeks (because I couldn't find the Revlon one I love) and I can't tell you the amount of times I've screamed at that little tube of filth. 

The two main problems?

1. The glue doesn't stay on as long as the Revlon one.
2. The applicator tip? Ugh, it's THE WORST. You have to pour some out on a napkin or piece of paper or something and then drag the lashes across it. BOOO! The Revlon one has an applicator that allows you to paste the glue onto the lashes directly. 

For more fake lash talk, go on over here if you missed it the first time around. 

Vaseline Spray & Go Moisturizer

I'm not really the type of person who needs to lotion up in a hurry, but apparently those people exist, so I'd imagine that's who this product is aimed at. But onto the bigger question: is this spray lotion any good? Um, bigtime. 

Best part about it? How easily it lets you lotion up your back. That's the most irritating spot to reach when it comes to applying anything, so that's my favourite part about using this stuff. Not sure why they wouldn't mention that in the advertising - I feel like they'd entice a lot more people into trying it out if they knew that it works best on hard-to-reach areas. 

Worst part about this lotion? The price ranges from $5 to $11, depending on where you buy it (which makes no sense to me). 

If this stuff manages to stay around for longer than a few months, then I'll probably buy another bottle when my current one runs out. Pretty neat idea.