I Know What I'm Doing - and Other Lies I Tell Myself: Dispatches from a Life Under Construction by Jen Kirkman - A Review

Jumping right in here, I absolutely loved this book. I didn't know too much about Jen Kirkman before reading it, but good god do I want more from this woman. Best parts ahead.

• "Bob Odenkirk once said that people should make their art, whatever it is, "as though their parents were dead."" - Love this, will continue to remember this from here on out.
• "I would never want to go through another wedding--a wedding that involves, literally, everyone and their brother attending. What's romantic about making out with someone in front of your uncles? I think the sexiest man in the world is the guy who could approach me at a bar and say, "Hi, I'm an orphan."" - Hahah, love this woman.
• This idea: "Go visit your family on the Fourth of July. There's a lot less drama because nothing is expected of anyone. Without the pressure of having to buy gifts or feel merry and bright - it was the best holiday we ever spent together."
• I will forever enjoy any person who expresses disdain for any kind of Live, Laugh, Love paraphernalia. 
• The idea that she buys a new coat in every new country she visits as that country's souvenir to herself IS JUST A GREAT IDEA.
• Love, love, love: "I saw a burrata appetizer that looked like a small bag of heavenly, oozy cheese - I guess because that's what it is. People should feel bad for people who don't have burrata - not boyfriends."
• "Trust me: traveling with a man doesn't always mean that everything in your life is perfect."
• "...and gazed at the unstoppable stars in the sky." God, I love the way she speaks. Am I, like, IN love with her?!
• "I never understood why traveling is something reserved for lovers only." YES.
• "Having someone who is more frightened than you is the greatest gift to someone who is a little bit frightened. It gives the less frightened person the chance to soothe someone else - which in turn self-soothes."
• "I don't know if I'm a true romantic or just an idiot with an ample imagination or if there's even a difference."
• "A female customer said to me, "You may not have direction but you have style. Your outfit is fantastic. And I hate people and talking to people so for me to even say this - you know you've got it going on." Those kinds of interactions always make me think that if women ran the world there could be world peace."
• "There's no reason to stress out about what you do for your fortieth or whatever-ith birthday. It's not about doing something one night to make memories for the rest of your life - it's about looking at the rest of your life and say, "Am I going where I want to go? Am I who I want to be? Am I defining my personal success based on other people's morals or goals? Can I only achieve happiness with outside validation or would I be truly happy just sitting in a pile of wood chips, being me? How can this year not be a repeat of last year's mistakes and patterns?""
• "All my romantic relationships have ended. Were those relationships not successes? Is success in a relationship only determined by it never ending? That's like saying that someone's life was a failure because... well, death."
• Mental Note: I've got to remember to read Joan Rivers' book Enter Talking because of how fondly she spoke of it. 

Those were just a few of my favourite parts of the book. She also included quotes at the beginning of each chapter, and I know we all think we're above a really good quote, but the fact is that we are not. Quotes are the fucking best. If you're in denial about that, well, I don't wish to debate your sorry ass. I purposely didn't include the quotes from the book that I especially loved in this post because I intend on posting them over the coming weeks. No one wants to be bombarded with twenty phenomenal quotes all at once, your heart can only really take on one at a time, there's a science behind this, I'm telling you. So I'll dole those out in good time. I wish I could endlessly read about this woman's life, she's so funny and great. I can't believe it took me this long to discover her.

Finally Here

http://halloweenhorrorsqueen.tumblr.com/post/163652778267

http://home-of-halloween.tumblr.com/post/163989492886

http://thisislizheather.tumblr.com/post/166867613089/how-id-love-to-spend-my-halloween

http://home-of-halloween.tumblr.com/post/163711709766/just-shower-thoughts-what-if-ghosts-try-to-kill

http://horrorandhalloween.tumblr.com/post/164140601457

Look, I get it, I’m biased, but my nieces and nephews are the cutest kids on THIS PLANET.

Why Your Partner Shouldn't Be Your Best Friend

I've said this for years and people continue to fight me on it. And look, I get it. It probably seems like a more romantic notion (and honestly, just easier) to have your partner be your best friend, but if you just let me explain myself here, you'll see why I'm onto something. (From here on, I'll refer to your partner as your S.O. (significant other) and B.F (best friend). It's easier that way and less redundant.)

1. If your S.O is your B.F. then who the hell are you supposed to go to when you want to complain about each one? YOU NEED EACH TO MAINTAIN SANITY. And I don't think that everyone needs to complain about every person in their life at some point (yes, actually I do think that but I'm trying not to be so negative) but it does help to vent once in awhile to someone that's always on your side. Without venting, people become murderers or republicans or worse, I'd imagine.

2. The activities. The stuff that I do with each of these people are vastly different from one another and thank God for that. I can be a well-rounded, functionally happy adult when I can do things with one that the other would never want to do.

3. The celebrations. As you're aware, I fully believe that friend anniversaries are just as important as S.O ones. And why shouldn't they be? Imagine you got an invitation to someone's ten year friend anniversary and it was treated like a wedding celebration? If I had any kind of money, I swear to you that's what I'd do. I'll never understand why romantic relationships are the ones most prioritized in our society, but I think it's bullshit. Yes, they're important, but they're not the most important (if you really want me not to shut up, it's the relationship you have with yourself that's most important, followed by the one you share with your pet, followed by your friendships/romantic relationships which are tied). Anyway, my original point was that by not having the same S.O & B.F in one person, you get more celebrations (birthdays, anniversaries, babies, etc.). And celebrations are some of the best parts of living on this planet.

4. The more important, loving people you have in your life, the happier you'll be. Fact. There are certain qualities that each person in my life has, and I love knowing who to go to when I need a certain something that I'm yearning for. Does that make sense? 

5. One day this person will die. And if they're both your B.F and S.O, who the hell is going to help get you through this time? Your dog? Well, maybe, your dog is great. But if you put so much onto one person, you're fucked on that day.

Have I sold you on this? I mean, it's an air-tight case. And if you disagree with me, I'm not trying to say that you're wrong. I just wish you'd open up to the idea that you don't need to depend on one sole person to get everything that you're after in this life. It's a lot of pressure.

Rant over.

http://thisislizheather.tumblr.com/post/166795462334/when-halloween-is-six-days-away

https://thespookshaveamidnightjamboree.tumblr.com/post/165266207996