Forgive the lateness of this monthly post! I wish I could say it’s late because I’ve been crazy busy, but it’s really been because I’ve been lounging my ass around various corners of my parent’s house and trying my best to not watch any American news. Here’s what went down last month.
I started watching The Parkers and, as expected, it’s pretty great. Kim for life.
I got a lash lift aaaaaand it was bullshit. My eyes have never been more irritated and that’s coming from someone who went through corneal surgery. I think lash lifts are supposed to be for people who already have long lashes. But if you have long lashes, then why the hell do you need them to be lifted? SCAM.
Are eyelash curlers bad for people with short lashes? I was told they were. But that was by someone who also recently fucked my lashes, so I’m not sure what to believe now.
So many new movies were watched in October: Killer Klowns From Outer Space (absolutely great), Motel Hell (also great), Moment of Truth: Stalking Back (too real, a little hard to watch, but I’m really looking forward to watching other made-for-tv-movies from the series), Hush (a great movie, but again: too much, I might not be able to handle modern horror & I’m fine with that), Summer Camp Nightmare (great), Goodnight Mommy (parts of it were really cringe-y to watch but it was incredible), Mom (so, so underrated), Wolf (it was actually pretty good, how on earth had I not seen it before?), House on Haunted Hill (the old version and it was great! It ends abruptly but it’s still a fun movie), Elvira: Mistress of the Dark (80s as hell, but not as terrible as I thought it’d be), Creepshow 2 (just a good time), Frogs (terrible and not in a fun way), Cujo (just a story of neglectful pet owners), Night of the Demons (not bad, not good), This Is Paris (it was really, really good. It’s definitely hard to watch if you’ve dealt with abuse in any way, but it’s really well done) and I got through about nine minutes of Cats before I just had to call it.
Started getting the cashew yogurt from Trader Joe’s and it’s so addictive.
The new SNLs have been all right, nothing special. And look, I love Jim Carrey. Forever will. But he isn’t good as Biden. It’s such a weird choice. Highlight of the episodes this month? The Bieberperformances, surprisingly.
I made the Impossible Burger at home (you can buy them at any Fairway Market) and they’re absolutely the top veggie burger on the market today. So damn good.
There’s this restaurant in Mississauga (Erin Mills Pump & Patio) that does such a good job of replicating this now-off-menu pasta that I used to love from Snug Harbour and I’m so thankful to have found it. (It’s the Hunters Penne Pasta with chicken, cremini and shitake mushrooms, Italian parsley, black truffle oil in a white wine cream sauce incase you want to taste heaven.)
We went to Downey’s on Halloween this year and for the first time got their homemade cheese bread. Life will never be the same. Some photos of the day below.
The LCBO puts out a seasonal magazine with food and drink recipes that I looooove. One of my favourite magazines for sure.
I made a batch of hot ginger toddies and yes they were good but waaaay too high maintenance to make at home. It’s definitely a drink that’s easier to just order when out.
I made these ginger sesame noodles with caramelized mushrooms and wow. Definitely will make again. I’d never thought of having broth at the bottom of a bowl full of noodles, but it’s such a great idea.
If you watch it with the sound off, it looks like she's revealing to James Bond that she was on Goldfinger's side the whole time https://t.co/1Uy81p1fCc
I once had a coworker who had just moved here from France and she could not get over her horror that on Halloween we waste pumpkins by making lanterns out of them and not turning them into soup or whatever
Our whole lives we hear: Don't talk about your period. Don't talk about sex. Don't talk about infertility. Don't talk about miscarriage. Don't talk badly about a pregnancy. Don't talk about PPD. Don't talk about anything post-partum except the baby. Only a baby matters. Not you.
You don’t “make” $15/hr. You “make” 100s or 1000s of $$ worth of product each hour and sell it for $15 each hour. You didn’t make anything for yourself. You sold an hour of your life and your body for $15. Don’t let them convince you otherwise. Your labor value is getting stolen
— Bryan Lindstrom (he/him/we) (@BryanLindstrom4) October 11, 2020
Normalize starting over as many times as you need.
Just spoke to a friend who was beating herself up for not doing more with this year and I had to remind her (and myself) that we were only supposed to be doing this for 2 weeks! A month max! You didn't waste this year, it was stolen and anything you DID achieve is a miracle!
hey babe I really appreciate you taking birth control even if it fucks you up, it just feels really good on my penis to not wear a condom for the 15 minutes of sex we have twice a week
If you walk down the street and you're mad that people are living in tents, please direct your anger and effort towards creating a housing system that doesn't allow people to end up homeless because they lost a job, had medical debt, or faced a rent hike they couldn't afford.
i wonder if my cat ever looks at me while i’m sleeping and thinks “ok that is the cutest way i have ever seen someone sleeping in my life” or is it one sided
Some things that I’m looking forward to doing this month: reading Lindy West’s new book, decorating my parent’s house for the Christmas season, and SNOW.
The leaves are starting to fall, the colder winds are coming, the pumpkins are starting to appear and I’ve never wanted an October more than I do right now. This time of year stirs up so much inside of me, I can barely breathe. However you enjoy this season, I hope you take some time to bask in these autumn days that are typically so fleeting. Here’s what went down last month.
I ate at Buvette and their snails were definitely the highlight.
I saw the movie The Car and it was phenomenal. You have to see it. The dialogue is atrocious, but a young, smokeshow James Brolin? Christ, he can get it. It’s a perfect bad movie.
I went to Gramercy Tavern and of course that place never disappoints. The service, the food, everything is impeccable. Some photos below.
Of course they have their own sanitizer
The Harvest Daiquiri with Frozen El Dorado 8 yr Rum, Green Chartreuse, Caradonna Farms Apple Cider, Lime
Chilled Corn Soup with Pickled Cauliflower, Beets, Avocado
Something new: did you know that Sephora has in-store rewards available that are different from the rewards shown on their website? Something to check out near the front cashier the next time you’re in a Sephora.
I bought the Mario Badescu Drying Lotion again because it’s such a great product for calming down acne and one bottle lasts at least six months or so.
A great piece about the arts scene in New York City right now.
I rarely listen to podcasts, but I listened to the Conan O’Brien episode of the Michelle Obama podcast and it was great. The episode is about marriage and I liked it so much because I love hearing about how couples first met and fell for one another.
As with every other person on earth this month, I watched The Social Dilemma on Netflix and then immediately deleted all the games off of my phone. I know the whole message was to delete Instagram and Facebook, but I’ve never had Facebook on my phone (what am I, 90?) and I truly don’t go on Instagram that much (not by choice, I have a shite battery that lasts about eight minutes a day).
I started watching Girlfriends and even though the pilot is rooooough (as most pilots are), it’s an all right show. It’s insane that Sex And The City basically stole this entire premise. I did, however, stop watching because all of the women are so wildly tiny, it warps my brain to sit and stare at skinny women for long periods of time.
I bought this scalp massager and holy hell, it’s incredible. It elevates a shower times a thousand.
I tried a sample of Fab Pharma’s Rescue Mask and it’s pretty great. It’s weird to not wash a mask off yes, but your skin feels amazing in the morning after use.
My friend Dusty had his movie reviewed by Roger Ebert’s website which is so huge and amazing. Wildly proud.
I started watching Sister, Sister on Netflix and Lisa is the greatest character of all time.
The new autumn candle at Trader Joe’s? Honeycrisp Apple! Already bought! Already sold out! Will I light it or just keep it to smell every so often? None of your business.
Another great New Yorker cover.
I was fortunate enough to eat at Atoboy (thank you Katie & Greg!) and it was perfection. I’ve never eaten tuna so heavenly. Such a wonderful meal and the service especially was warm as hell.
I finally bought those Aerie bike shorts I’ve wanted for months and they’re incredible. Bike shorts should always be this damn soft.
Finally ate at Arte Cafe on the Upper West Side and loved it.
I visited the Krispy Kreme flagship in Times Square and it was pretty great. Most locations in every suburban city have glass windows where you see the donuts being made, so I didn’t get the huge appeal?
I may or may not have indulged in some of the seasonal desserts at Comfortland in Astoria, I won’t tell you details because they weren’t anything amazing. Honestly, nothing compares to the apple fritters at San Remo’s in Etobicoke.
I watched the Surviving R. Kelly sequel on Netflix and it didn’t really have any new information, which makes sense because there hasn’t even been a trial yet.
I also watched all of season one and some of season two of Twin Peaks (for the first time) and I have some thoughts. First things first, the pilot is incredible. But… why is the background/theme music so terrible? It never matches any of the scenes in tone and it just leaves me confused most times. Some parts are so fucking off and bad (acting-wise, script-wise) that I literally googled certain scenes to see if they were supposed to be funny or if I was missing something. What the fuck is with all of the dancing? And THIS scene? What in the good holy fuck?? UGH, and then David Lynch SHOWS UP IN THE SHOW? Kill me. The entire series should’ve lasted one season. I can officially say that I don’t give one shit about who the fuck killed Laura Palmer, she’s the luckiest character of them all to be dead. Blow me, Lynch.
When Jhene said ‘I used to think I was introverted because I really liked being alone but it turns out that I just like my peace, and I am very extroverted around people who bring me peace.’ I FELT THAT IN MY CHEST.
Ok I’m stoned but this seems like a good idea: what if there was an app that both you and your partner have where you both swipe right or left on movies that are on your streaming services and when you find a match it lets you know
i sit with my daughter while she falls asleep and i always whisper “i love you” in her ear as soon as she falls asleep& she says “i love you too” well tonight we had a little argument before she fell asleep i still whispered “i love you” & all she whispered back was “good” LMFAO
It should count for 4 if you swish it. There I said it.
— C.J. “Lakers Fan Since I Was A Baby” Toledano (@CJToledano) September 12, 2020
i like how nick nurse looks like a kid who is in the middle of a realistic dream where he woke up coaching a major league basketball team and is like "oh god, ok, im gonna try!"
my girlfriend regularly tells me “if free public libraries didn’t already exist and someone tried to invent them, they would be condemned as a socialist plot” and I think about that a lot.
i hate that weight gain is seen as ‘not looking after yourself’ when for a lot of people it’s a sign that we are enjoying food, maybe seeing our friends more, maybe going out more, maybe just letting go of societal standards for a bit! weight gain can be from happy changes too
Dave Grohl goes above and beyond to make 2020 a little more tolerable. Man, this is just heartwarming as fuck! There goes my hero indeed. I wanna be Dave when I grow up. https://t.co/QCsuM0MHp8
does anyone else constantly think about how Jessica Simpson was body shamed in 2009 for being a size 4? and how fatphobic our society has to be to think that even this very small body was unacceptable and worthy of global bullying? because whew I really really do. pic.twitter.com/mSj7GVyzgF
Diving catch through smoke while wearing a face mask, what a demented universe we're all trying to bend into some semblance of normalcy https://t.co/cNKrXiPkdg
Y'all ever think about how indigenous people successfully lived in the Americas for 15,000 years then Europeans came here and 500 years later the whole nation is experiencing apocalyptic climate disaster.
sometimes i remember that if a clown wants to trademark their makeup they have to paint it on an egg that is stored in a special clown egg warehouse and then i have to go lie down pic.twitter.com/5ltP6aQzL5
Why get a dog if you’re just gonna pull on it every time it stops to smell something? That’s what they do. Why not take a fish out the tank and throw it on the floor
Why don’t conservatives ever want to interfere with my body in a HELPFUL way? Fix this little bump on my leg! Exfoliate my elbows! Stretch my quads! Bitch, FLOSS ME.
This is a reminder that the IRS audits way more people who make under $30,000 per year than they do millionaires because the GOP repeatedly stripped their funding and the poor don't have the resources to fight the IRS, while the rich have lawyers to fight them at every turn
once u start shoplifting there is no going back it literally rewires your neural pathways and thought patterns like I now get physically mad whenever I have to pay for something
I wish anti-maskers weren’t a thing so us regular people could complain about masks being annoying without looking like a Q Anon dipshit who refuses to wear one. I just wanna be able to say “this sucks” without having to follow it up with “BUT I WILL BECAUSE IT’S MY CIVIC DUTY”
Some things that I’m looking forward to doing this month: I must decorate, I really want to make this fall kale salad that sounds incredible, I’m planning a visit to Sleepy Hollow for the day, if I can find the time I really want to try these vegan burgers, I need to finalize the details for my costume this year, MUST BUY these winter stamps, I cannot wait to get my hands on these again, I’m intending on doing my 31-days-of-Halloween celebration yet again (which means that I’ll try to do at least one spookily themed thing each day), and I will definitely be watching some of these 90s sitcoms Halloween episodes. Also, I’m not a huge cronut fan but these flavours (below)?! Get out of here. Already pre-ordered.
First things first, welcome to (under normal circumstances) the best time of the year. Will this perfect time of year be different than previous years? Of course. We’re all still trying to function in this modern version of hell. SO that being said, I am still going to try and make the most of the seasonal things I like to do (minus seeing the people that I love and haven’t seen for almost a year, eating the baked goods from places that I’m not allowed to visit, or being able to just hug my family). MINUS ALL OF THAT. I will cook what I cannot go out to eat. I will watch the movies in my home that I’d normally insist on watching with others. I will decorate. I will light all of the autumn-scented candles that I can get my grubby hands on. Autumn will happen and I will do the best that I can. And I encourage you to do the same. Here’s what happened last month:
I found out that there will definitely be a Scream 5 and I am pumped.
Two more songs that I love off of Taylor Swift’s new album: epiphany and mad woman. It’s fast becoming my album of the summer (I’m, like, super indie, I know).
Blue Diamond has these flavoured almonds out right now and the salt & vinegar as well as the dill pickle flavours… are insanely good.
I sent this to my mom and she loved it as much as I do (below).
Scott Hubbard (@scottyhubs) has created a short video on TikTok with music sonido original. | This was in my drafts 😂 #fyp #tiktokpets #dog #cosplay
I tried samples of the Verb Ghost Shampoo, Hair Mask and Spray and they were all equal parts bullshit. Who sends out a spray sample in a small packet, so that it can’t be sprayed? Ignoring the idiotic packaging, the products themselves just fell flat. Absolutely nothing special here.
I tried Ops Pizza in Brooklyn and it was great! Better than Prince Street or Mama’s Too? Not a chance. Still good, though.
I bought this mask off of Etsy in anticipation of October’s arrival.
I also got this Tan Lines candle that smells incredible. I know it’s basic as hell but candles might be saving my life.
I tried beef carpaccio for the first time (!) at L’Artusi and it was great! I’d describe it as a lighter, more dainty steak tartare.
I also tried the vegan chicken parm sandwich at VSPOT and dear lord was it good. Tasted exactly like a regular chicken parm. Must remember this place and go again.
Oneya (@angryreactions) has created a short video on TikTok with music original sound. | #duet with @bobbysrey that cake is beautiful. #fyp #foryou
I’m not sure when I’ll feel okay about visiting the new Krispy Kreme flagship, but I’ll tell you one thing: I can’t wait. I remember when they opened their first Canadian location and my dad was soexcited, I think that’s where my love of the company comes from.
I’ve decided to stop trying to lose weight. When I diet, my brain goes crazy & I binge & make matters worse. I choose to accept & love myself as I am NOW. I will treat myself with care to ensure I can live fully. Not sure why I’m telling you -maybe someone needs to hear it? ♥️
hot take: people only like summer because it was our only time off for like 12 years and its ingrained in our minds to like it. the actual season is fucking atrocious
Every summer night, in every neighbourhood in Canada, there’s a middle-aged man proudly playing The Tragically Hip in his backyard, loudly singing along with Gordie into his beer. Tonight, in my neighborhood of #JunctionTO, that man is me.
my midwestern ex doesnt give ppl the finger (that's mean) so when he got mad while driving (a lot) he'd give ppl a thumbs down out the window so they'd know he wasnt mad, just disappointed, and to this day i think that is the funniest shit in the world
It's amazing how quickly "the President is going to cheat to win" is just normalized as a factor we must all work around because the system itself is far too corrupted to stop him.
No mail. No healthcare. No jobs. No free or fair elections. Banned from the rest of the world. Our taxes blown on giveaways to corrupt corporations and institutions. Police violence against anyone who challenges this arrangement. We’re living in a failed state, no doubt about it.
young people the messaging couldn't be more clear!! Stay at home! Go to work ! We'll give you CERB! Unless your minimum wage job needs you ! Social distance! in the back of the restaurant you work in! have a pod of 6 people! its just your co-workers! lol! y r u so selfish?!?
i need every creator to always keep this sentiment in mind bc even though i try to tell my fav creators i love their work theres alot of gushing n silent admiration n looking to it for the inspiration they don't see pic.twitter.com/lkqOuIQP4n
I jokingly asked my grandpa to pls not let any visitors into my room bc of work, then later walked into him posting a sign on my door that said “DO NOT ENTER, KAREN IS BUSY” w a calligraphy brush in a traditional top-down, right-left korean sign 😂 we are the only two at home 😂
We’re so numb as a nation that when NASA reports a possibility of an astriod getting very close we read, consider it for a second and then keep scrolling to see what else is going on that might be more juicy.
This is Ziggy. He’s practicing saying hi to the other dogs in the neighborhood. Just moved here and would love to make a good first impression. 14/10 pic.twitter.com/C2ZGWM3It9
I know I’m harping on this but Hitler and the Nazis didn’t say “we’re going to scapegoat Jewish people and murder them by the millions”; they said “the Jews are a threat to the German way of life and we must defend ourselves.” The same “self-defense” rhetoric Fox & the GOP use.
This is the first generation where both men and women in a household work full time and barely get by, and people think they’re the laziest and most entitled how’d that happen?
I’m not from nyc (though I was born here), but I think part of what feels so dismissive about transplants saying “new york is dead” is that they’re revealing that the only reason they’re here is to consume, and not to give in return. they’re literally parasites.
Some movies that I rewatched: It’s Complicated (the family of children is so annoying in this movie, but I love all of the adults and the food and it’s just comforting to watch) and Adventures in Babysitting (a perfect movie).
I started rewatching Moesha and it’s great to see again, but I can’t believe I didn’t notice how incredible the side character of Kim is! She holds the show together! Obviously, this realization makes me excited for when her spinoff show The Parkers comes to Netflix next month.
I bought this strawberry shampoo from The Body Shop (impulse buy for $5) and the smell reminds me so much of being in middle school (meaning this in a good way). Is it a great shampoo? Meh.
I tried a decent sized sample of the moisturizing cream from Sunday Riley and the best part about it is the smell. I can’t imagine a world in which I’d pay $65 for a basic moisturizer, though, so that says it all.
I tried that anchovy pasta that Mindy Kaling recommended and it’s basic as hell, wouldn’t make again.
I made my first purchase from Everlane and the quality of the shirt is beautiful, if not a little shapeless. Will I buy from them again? Probably not. It’s just so bland for the price point.
I own it already, but I’m so happy to hear that Safety Not Guaranteed is back on Netflix. Everyone should watch it. The ending is amazing.
I’m using the new Trader Joe’s Strawberry Lemon Sugar Scrub and does it do anything magical? Not really. The smell is incredible, but there’s something gross about the little strawberry seeds in the scrub. No thanks.
New watch alert! $25 at Nordstrom. I’ve been making fun of Nathan having a gold watch for some time now and then realized it might be because I was jealous and wanted one of my own. So here we are.
Idea: take hot baths in the summer. I never used to do this and it’s so relaxing. It doesn’t make any sense.
I tried the vegan burger patties from Trader Joe’s and they’re only okay, I wouldn’t get them again. The Impossible Burger is hands down the best one I’ve tried, with a close second place to the Beyond Burger.
The Met reopened (as well as their rooftop installation) and I can’t bring myself to go. I know they’re taking precautions and all, but I just don’t want to do it. It does look incredible, though.
I tried the brunch burger at Vite Vinosteria in Astoria and I know I say this a lot, but holy shit. Might be the best burger in Astoria? What the hell is with Italian restaurants having these sleeper hit burgers all of a sudden? Vesta is the same way! Either way, I’m not complaining. I mean, look at this beast.
Brunch burger at Vite Vinosteria in Astoria
I started a Might Buy bookmark category in my browser window, to cut down on impulse buying and really care about what I spend my money on. Here’s a list of things that I can’t decide if I want to buy or not:
I’ve heard such good things about this face wash, but I have ten different open ones in my washroom so this is low on the list.
Some things I’m looking forward to this month: I think I’m going to start rewatching Friday Night Lights, I’m also working on my October list of what to watch each day that month, I’m so excited that Ijeoma Oluo’s new book has a release date of December 2020, and I’m excited to finish the new book I’m reading (that you’ll be hearing about imminently).
If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in July over here.
The key word being was. We bought an air conditioner! We’ve been an A/C-free family for some time now, but since we’re spending so much time at home, we figured now was the time to be cool. In other news, everything still blows! What a shock! Here’s how I spent July.
I didn’t even know another Halloween movie was being made but of course I’ll go see it even if it turns out to be trash, you gotta support classic horror franchises, that’s just basic horror etiquette 101.
This is the most basic, boring-sounding sandwich on planet earth, but it tastes incredible I promise you (I didn’t add bacon, but I did add fresh mozzarella) and whatever bread you use, it’ll still be great. I find myself constantly forgetting about the greatness of mayo because I, my dear, am an idiot.
I ordered a bunch of new address labels on Zazzle because they were having a Christmas in July sale, so I bought some seasonally inspired labels to use over the next few months. If you’re not seasonally co-ordinating your return address labels, are you even living?
I attempted to watch the new Baby-Sitter’s Club on Netflix and it’s really not meant for me. I was never into the books or the movie or any of it, I never liked the idea of kids caring about making money, it seemed too sad to me. “Just be a kid!” I’d always thought.
Speaking of childhood nostalgia, I have started to watch reruns online of Sweet Valley High, which I loved as a kid. It’s no Breaker High, but it’s still pretty great to rewatch. God, Jessica really was an absolute bitch.
Some other things that I’ve rewatched: Con Air (practically a perfect movie, will always love, *Nic Cage forever* might be the only tattoo I’d ever get), Supermarket Sweep is on American Netflix and I was so excited (for about three episodes) then I moved on with my life, Sleepless in Seattle (still a very nice, average, reliable movie), Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (actually a really great summer movie, will always be a fun time to watch, will forever be a huge Keanu fan, I just feel like I could trust him??), and Dick Tracy (will always love this movie even if it has eight million too many montages, the set design is gorgeous, and this one outfit that Madonna wears makes me question… everything).
Some new movies that I’ve watched: Always Be My Maybe (so, so great! How did it take me so long to see this! So many good scenes, such a good movie), The Karate Kid (insane that I hadn’t seen it before, kids were uncomfortably mean in the 80s, favourite part was when Mr. Miyagi beats up the children, great movie), The Stepfather (pretty fun time, so happy we’ve starting watching horror movies again), Eat Pray Love (ugh, I don’t know, I do love movies about women just leaving and doing fun shit alone and abandoning their lives, but this was pretty lame, I hated James Franco’s character more than life and truly didn’t understand how Julia Roberts was even briefly into him), and finally the original The Hills Have Eyes (which I loved weirdly enough despite being incredibly tense the entire movie, I just thought it was so well done and scary and incredible, the rape scene is of course awful and I shut my eyes for that part, but that was the only thing I hated, it doesn’t make sense that I liked this movie so much).
I don’t know how to word this, but something is off with the reasonably priced (and almost too cheap) parmesan sold at Trader Joe’s. It melts weird. It doesn’t taste like normal cheese. Something is afoot and I won’t buy it any longer. I’m truly dreading and equally anticipating the day that all of Trader Joe’s secrets are exposed. Be warned.
That being said, obviously I’m in love with the seasonal summer candles that TJ just released. We have a complicated relationship.
Trader Joe summer candle trio, 2020
I made this gruyere mac and cheese with caramelized onions (I used almond milk and it still came out good) and can every recipe just include caramelized onions? The world is ending, let’s just put sweet, tiny, brown onions on everything and call it a day.
I have to remember that Essie’s vibrant colours just f-ing suck. Only their muted/bland colours are good. They should really just stick to those. And if you’re looking for loud colours that stand out, the summer collection at Urban Outfitters is my go-to (and there’s always a 3 for $10 sale with them).
I listened to Taylor Swift’s new album and so far my favourites are definitely: the 1 and this is me trying.
I’ve been thinking about cancelling my Ipsy subscription again (because I think I don’t care about makeup at this current moment in time) and when I logged on to cancel, they let me choose one of the items being sent next month as if they knew I wanted to leave! So I chose a Sunday Riley product (because any sample I’ve tried from them, I’ve loved) so maybe I’ll cancel next month?
I tried a sample of Drunk Elephant’s shampoo & conditioner (which smelled so lovely) and my hair did seem softer the next day. There’s something about this brand though, I feel like they might be tricking us with their beautiful packaging and minimalist persona.
I bought and tried the ancient Biore Strips and I have absolutely no idea if they did what they’re supposed to do. Are you supposed to see the blackheads or whiteheads come off onto the strip? It felt like it just tried to peel my face off. No idea what’s going on with these.
I have been in love with the Peter Thomas Roth Correction Pads, I use one pad before bed each night and I think they’re doing something good because I always wake up with no new pimples. It has even started erasing all of the redness I’ve been experiencing lately from the summer heat and sweat and mask-wearing. At this point, I can definitely see myself rebuying when I run out, and if I do then I’ll definitely not get them from Sephora because you can get them way cheaper at other online retailers.
I’ve also started using this Dr. Dennis Gross All-In-One face cleanser and I think it’s a good one. It’s hard to tell because I started using it the same day at the correction pads I mentioned above (yes that was a bad idea but here we are), so maybe they’re working together to make my face good? We’ll revisit this.
I finally opened up this Belif set I bought a few months ago and it’s really nothing special. I think the face cream is probably the best item in there because you truly don’t need to use a lot to feel moisturized. But the face cleanser? Meh. I don’t think it does very much, it definitely didn’t help any redness. And the toner? Don’t get me started on how I kind of think toner might be a scam. And the “eye moisturizer”? Seems superfluous. My eye area is plenty moist, thanks.
Perfect summer soap scent: Fresh Rainfall. If I can’t travel this year, I will escape into this scent. (Send help.)
So I heard that Lady M now ships their cakes to Canada and I was able to scream in excitement for approx. four seconds before looking into it and seeing that it’ll cost you over $100 to get ONE cake sent. THE GALL, I tell you. THE GALL.
I briefly looked into the app Sweatcoin after hearing good things, but it really just seems like an app where its main goal is to track you. And yes, your phone already does that whether you’re aware or not, but I think I’ll pass on the extra tracking.
I heard that the upcoming Halloween Bob’s Burgers episode will “follow the kids as they try to deliver a burger to the hotel on their street.” It’s such a sad little bit of tiny information, but I love their seasonal episodes so much that I’ll take any crumbs available.
Christ, why do I keep forgetting that Bareburger is absolutely nothing special? Why in the good fuck is it taking so long for a Shake Shack to come to Astoria?!
I ate on the patio at Hoja Santa in Astoria and the tacos were nothing to write home about. The service, drinks and chips were outstanding though, so I may have just ordered badly.
I refer to myself as dark skinned and people are like “wtf no you’re not” I refer to myself as light skinned and people are like “lmfaooo this bitch is delusional” so from here on out I will simply be referring to myself as....skinned
Hey, I think President Trump is on to something with this idea of limiting COVID infections by not testing as much. Who knew the secret for staying forever young was as simple as not celebrating your birthday?
small dog slander makes me sad. Of course they’re “yappy,” they have tiny bodies, it’s not a personality trait. They also have teeny tiny paws to put on your leg when you are sad
I woke up with a small, specific sadness: I miss being on a trip with family or friends and waking up to the murmuring sound of other people, already awake, having a conversation in the kitchen in the morning.
i remember my ex got mad at me bc i once tweeted i wanted to cuddle with shia labeouf, lmaooo like every argument we had he would be like “why don’t u go fuck shia” like bro i would if i could 😭
Has everyone stopped to meditate on the fact that an 87-year-old woman on chemo has to keep working full-time, full-force, because she's quite literally the only thing stopping the country's full slide into fascism?
Can’t keep 900 baseball players safe with almost unlimited resources but sure we can protect millions of kids jammed into schools where teachers have to raise money on GoFundMe for like pencils and shit.
My dog decided it was time to go to bed about twenty minutes ago. Off he went. I stayed on the couch, ya know, as is my right. I’ll me damned if he didn’t just walk back in here and look at me like “did I stutter? It is time for us to go TO BED.” Welp, good night, y’all.
I tried Thai iced coffee and it was so wildly sweet and too aromatic, I probably wouldn’t get it again. And I also tried a Vietnamese iced coffee and it was the perfect level of sweet! What’s the difference between the two, you ask?
I finally tried the katsu sandwich at Hi-Collar as takeout in the East Village and it was absolutely nothing special. No idea why people are so into it.
I haven’t been to Bite in so many months, so it was nice to get takeout earlier this week. God how I’ve missed their ciabatta bread. They use it on their sandwiches and it comes from Balthazar each morning and it’s always heavenly.
I tried a grapefruit shandy and holy shit, it might be my favourite new summer drink.
I ate on the patio at L’Artusi since it just reopened and good god, that carbonara will change you. So psyched to see they have the wagyu steak tartare on the menu now, too. The burger, the panzanella salad and the charred corn were all great, but that carbonara was the standout.
Yeah, I’m NOT gonna get a Manhattan??
Carbonara heaven, 'L’Artusi
L’Burger with roasted potatoes at L’Artusi
Sweet Irene!
Some things I’d like to do this month: I’d love to try this tomato toast with blue cheese mayo, I’m going to start using a new clothes steamer I just bought with the hopes of getting rid of my iron & ironing board, I rebought a tube of Revitalash because of how great my lashes were looking when I used it a few years ago so I’ll start using it on August 1st and track my progress to prove how great this product is, I can’t wait for Moesha to be coming to Netflix this month, and I am waiting waiting waiting until I can find time to return to Lilia (on the patio) to eat this incredible tomato focaccia & garlic butter (shown below).
If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in June over here.
Can someone just hit me in the face hard enough so that I wake up in 2021? As a favour to me? (Also I love that we’re all assuming that a new year means a completely fresh new slate and that none of the actions taken this year will affect the rest of our lives? It’s ridiculous, but it’s a type of logic that I can absolutely get on board with.) In any case, life is hell right now. Here’s what went on in hell this month.
I started doing Ipsy bag reviews again. The best find from the bag this month: a REALHER lipstick. Just amazing quality and I need to look further into their other products.
I tried hard seltzer (not White Claw, it was a brand called HOOT) and it was very okay, I just don’t see the big deal? I think we all have low standards for things being good.
God, I miss Jon Stewart. I find myself just watching old segments from his show which are sadly still incredibly relevant.
I visited this coffee shop in Astoria called Coffee + Cake that’s so lovely. They make freshly baked goods each day and homemade ice cream and I’ll definitely return. This is their tomato & parmesan focaccia bread.
I tried to eat the black stem for some reason too?? Not my smartest idea.
I started taking antihistamine eye drops for seasonal allergies and they’ve cured me completely. It’s insane. I love them.
I tried birthday cake Kit Kats because why wouldn’t I and of course they’re good. But they’re basically just… white Kit Kats… and that’s already a thing that exists… and look I’m not trying to hate on them, so I’ll keep my mouth shut about it from here on out.
If I became famous, the first thing I’d endorse would be Vicks (obviously), but the second thing? This dairy-free, almond milk yogurt DAH! Yes, the name is terrible. But the yogurt is heavenly. The madagascar vanilla will change you.
Finally made this ricotta jam jar with crostini and it was everything I wanted it to be and more.
I’ve been keeping a collection of photos taken of the city throughout the pandemic that are just gorgeous photos, here are a few.
April 2020, photo by Jerome Strauss
March 12th, 2020, the first night of Broadway going dark - photo by Gretchen Robinette for Gothamist
June 2020, photo by Benjamin Norman for The New York Times
April 2020, photo by Jerome Strauss
April 2020, photo by Jerome Strauss
I watched the Holy Chicken! documentary from the Super Size Me guy and it was okay. I did know a lot of those chicken facts already since we haven’t been eating meat these last few months, so it wasn’t anything revolutionary. And then after I watched it, I was reading about it and then came across all the gross behavior by the creator of the film and uggghhhh I wish I hadn’t watched and supported it now.
I tried this New Orleans cold brew and whoa. Good stuff. I don’t exactly know the difference between cold brew and coffee and it’s such a boring thing to look up, so… here we are.
Will forever love the food at The Thirsty Koala in Astoria. Thank you Katie, Greg & Irene for gifting us so much of their food this month! Truly so sweet of you.
Favourite tweets of the month.
They criminalize the homeless so that they don’t have to house them. They criminalize drug addicts so that they don’t have to address substance abuse as a public health problem. They criminalize the poor so that they don’t have to address wealth inequality.
— antifa’s bus driver (@Lwrathofkhan) June 6, 2020
Nothing more insulting than your dog walking into the room you're in, looking around and then leaving.
The US has tried to get rid of covid the way I try to get abs - I try really hard for a couple months then I get annoyed that it’s taking so long and decide abs aren’t real.
Remember when Pizza Hut pan pizzas were basically a goddamn culinary delicacy? They’d bring them out in a real fucking skillet that was piping at about 700 degrees Fahrenheit right as your third song kicked in on the jukebox after you’d played a game of Galaga. We were kings. pic.twitter.com/G7dQBRd3qQ
Imagine someone u love is fast asleep in bed after a long day of working to help others. Imagine that while she is asleep armed strangers break down her door & shoot her in her bed 8 times. If this was ur daughter or sister, u would want justice. #BreonnaTalyor deserves the same.
not everyone who has been sexually assaulted immediately recognizes that is what happened to them. it can take days or weeks or even years for someone to realize what happened to them was not okay. believe victims rather than questioning why it took so long for them to speak up.
My conspiracy theory is that time travel IS real & someone keeps trying to fix 2020 by changing something but every time they do, they unwittingly make it worse. How else do you explain the sudden disappearance of murder hornets? They saved us from those but at what cost?!?!
I bought a ton of underwear from Aerie since I don’t feel comfortable going into any stores or on the subway yet, and they’re actually pretty great quality (I’m sorry I didn’t get on this sooner, Marla.) The sizing is a little off in that one medium doesn’t fit like another medium, but once you figure it out, you’re good.
I learned how to make vodka martinis at home, so what I’m trying to say is that I’m better than you now.
Truly don’t know how I feel about this news, but I think I have to support it, right? I wish we could just leave good things alone. Why must we always want more.
I watched The Joy Luck Club and here’s my takeaway: don’t have daughters. And also maybe don’t have mothers? It seems like everyone is a disappointment to every character in this movie. I was expecting to love it, so when that didn’t happen I was a little disappointed.
I watched Dan In Real Life (mainly because of Steve Carell who was way too good for this movie) and it suuuuucked. Hated Dane Cook. Hated the plot. Hated the whole white, rich, we-dance-as-a-family type aesthetic of the whole movie.
I watched the first season of You and a few episodes of the second season and uuuuuuuggggghhhhhh what a garbage show. I don’t need to see anyone romanticize some pathetic Gossip Girl loser who I feel no empathy for. It’s actually just so badly written and how on earth did someone green-light this trash. Here’s a good piece written about it.
Also watched a bunch of reruns of 3rd Rock From The Sun and what an underrated, great show. Wish I remembered it more.
I’ve been on a real Harrison Ford bender lately and I can’t see it stopping anytime soon. I watched Sabrina (which was okay, the best part was seeing him play a nerdish, unlovable character). I also watched Working Girl (which is really not a great movie, but it was only watchable for Ford). Also saw Air Force One and what a movie. How on earth have I never seen it before?? Such a fox. If you haven’t seen it before, I shall entice you with this one line:
Rainier cherries are in season now and while I don’t particularly love a cherry, these are delightful.
I’ve been sucking down these Saratoga Springs sparkling waters for days and there’s no turning back, they’re refreshing in a way I didn’t think existed. Just pure magic.
The only summer salad that’s worth a damn is this panzanella salad, but make sure you add fresh mozzarella to it.
I never thought I liked biscotti until a friend recently made it, so maybe I’m just into chocolate biscotti?
I started watching Insecure but couldn’t really get into it, maybe I’ll give it more of a chance, maybe not. I feel like if you’re not hooked into a show within three episodes, it’s not gonna happen.
I rewatched Clueless and it’s really just a perfect movie. I could quote every line in this movie at one point in my life and I think I might still be able to. Still looking to emulate this perfect outfit one day.
Cannot stop making this broccoli pasta with Banza and the Beyond Meat sausage.
I finished watching Fuller House and I’ll never know why I wanted to, it’s such a corny/actually-bad show and yet I still watched. Thankfully it’s over forever.
Incase you’re looking for an alternative site to Amazon for buying books: Bookshop.org
It’s been a harder month than normal and I found myself watching The Land Before Time and uncontrollably weeping onto my yoga mat (I like to watch movies in the background when I’m working out). A kind of cry that comes around every decade or so where you can’t really breathe and you’re blinded my tears and everything is too much to handle. I know it’s a sad movie, but I think it was the movie and the combination of this month that made me react that way. In any case, I hope kids today still want to watch that movie. It’s a hard one, but it’s really still so good.
My grandmother Ma passed away this month and since travel is not allowed, it was especially difficult for this to happen now. I felt helpless being separated from most of my family so I wrote a bit about how it made me feel. I could talk about the greatness of this woman endlessly, how it’s insane that you could live in this day and age and not read or write and still enrich the lives of everyone you know, there’s no way to sum her up as a person. I’ll just miss her. Her voice, her endless encouragement, all of it.
Some things I’d like to do this month: I’d like to not sink into an unending pit of depression (that’d be great), I’d like to keep going on our nightly walks with Nathan, I’m likely going to buy these bike shorts as soon as they’re back in stock and you can’t stop me (I already have an outfit in mind, trust me it’s gonna look good), I was looking forward to movie theatres reopening (the Regal near our house specifically) but the date’s been pushed again to the end of July (which will likely get pushed again), and I’d really like to start and finish another book this month.
If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in May over here.
I’m really hoping that May is a more uplifting month than the last two months combined, I need it to be. We’re still staying at home and doing the best we can, but there have been so many things cancelled lately and I really just want to look forward to something. Here’s what went down this month.
I watched the first season of Dave on FX and wow. Just wow. It’s such a good show and I’m so glad I listened to my brother Robbie and watched it. Ten episodes. Each better than the last.
I also watched the new Mindy Kaling creation on Netflix, Never Have I Ever, and it was as good as I hoped it would be and more. Again, there are only ten episodes and I wish there were more. Also, the soundtrack is killer, seeforyourself, bud.
If you are looking for an uncomplicated curry recipe to make, this is the perfect one (I used green beans instead of snap peas and it was still great).
As parts of your life slip beyond your reach, know those parts don’t define you. You aren't your work. You aren't what you own or where you live. You aren't even your relationships. Don’t think for a minute that your you-ness has slipped away, too. You’re right here. Keep moving.
I just got an email from a woman I’m going to work with in the fall and she signed off with “I look forward me meeting you. I look forward to meeting anybody.” lol
Tip: never get tomato paste in a can. Tastes so tinny! Did everyone else already know this?
I tried Hal’s New York Seltzer water in the COLA flavour and HOLY CHRIST. Tastes exactly like Coke. It’s fucking wild. Shoulda bought ten of them but when I went back they were all gone. Like a mirage.
Is it abnormal to share a photo of a gorgeous woman? ‘Cause I saw this photo of Lili Reinhart (from Riverdale) and my jaw dropped, so gorgeous.
I mean, wow.
I finally finished this season of Curb and the last two episodes were probably the best. There were definitely cringey parts in a few episodes this season, but overall it was pretty good. I really think Larry David is probably just an asshole who happens to be funny sometimes, just my impression.
I’ve been burned so many times, but I’m never buying Barilla pasta again. Their no-boil lasagna sheets no-joke look like recycled sandpaper and taste like ASS. Never again. Also, I think I’m against no-boil lasagna sheets. Just boil some sheets! What’s the big deal! You’re not busy!
And speaking of lasagna, I’ve made this mushroom spinach lasagna three times this month and it’s heavenly. The only thing I do differently is that I use a food processor to grind up the mushrooms so they’re almost like a paste. Tastes incredible. It tastes better when it’s reheated the next day, too. Lasagna lunch? Get out of here, best day of the week.
These blueberry breakfast cookies are now officially in the recipe rotation since I’m about to make them for the third time. They taste better after being chilled, in my opinion. And not to be pornographic, but a blueberry bursting in your mouth? Yes, please.
I just tried this bath soak and it’s made me want to create a bath basket for myself, which is basically just a basket full of bath shit like Epsom salts, bath oils, bubble bath, bath bombs, etc. Future me is gonna be relaxed as fuck.
Love reading what people want to eat out when life is back on again. If you don’t think I already have a list going, THINK AGAIN. I’ll post it when better days are near.
I made this cauliflower bolognese and look, it was good but I’ll never make it again because it took WAY too long for what you’re ultimately getting. It’s not a bolognese. Nothing meatless should be allowed to be called a bolognese, it’s unjust.
I watched The Phantom of the Opera for the 11th (??) time when it streamed for free a few weeks ago and it was, as always, magical. I maintain that Colm Wilkinson was the very best phantom there ever was. (P.S. I will always love these types of videos, below.)
I did a Zoom call with my whole family and we played games on jackbox.tv and it was actually really fun. Might become a standing Sunday morning activity.
When I’m not crying or drinking or taking a bath, I like to do beauty masks. But here’s the thing: I think all hair masks are a scam. How can you tell that they’ve DONE anything to your hair? Don’t you think that some charlatan could easily just put some basic-ass conditioner into a tiny disposable package and label it as some hair rejuvenating miracle? And while we’re here, it’s 100% likely that face masks are bullshit too. We’re being bamboozled and at this point I can’t even care about it because it’s genius. I’ll keep buying them and they’ll continue to do nothing.
I tried a sample of Dr. Dennis Gross’s face serum and whoa. I love the idea of using a serum right after washing your face, so I just bought a reward-sized sample of this Drunk Elephant serum (it’s on its way) that’ll hopefully feel somewhat similar.
I rewatched some of Master of None and it remains great.
Other still-great things that I also rewatched: Arlington Road & House of Sand and Fog.
I made the Dalgona coffee that everyone’s been making, but I didn’t put it on top of milk (that sounded gross). I put it on top of iced coffee for, like, some kind of super coffee. It was really good. I was jacked for hours. (And I haven’t tried it, but this Dalgona frosted chocolate cake looks nuts.)
I rewatched most of Community and I truly forgot what a great show that was. The first three seasons, I mean. MAYBE four. Best episodes: the missing pen one, the chaos theory one, love the Halloween ones, and the video game one is great. I will continue to hate musical episodes of any show, why do they do it? Who is it for? I’ve never heard one person say that they loved when a regular show did a musical episode. END THIS NONSENSE.
So I attempted to make the Asiago Chicken Bowtie Pasta from Jack Astor’s from this copycat recipe, and even though it reeeeally doesn’t taste the same, it’s still a decent recipe. It also tastes way better reheated the next day.
I made these chocolate chip cookies and they were very good. Not a super complicated recipe either, which is always a plus.
Tip: you shouldn’t just plop shampoo on the top of your head and then start rubbing it in (this leads to flat hair). You should rub it in right above the top of your neck and then work it in from there, it gets way more lathered up quicker this way. Please try it for yourself.
I finally tried the Canyon Creek caesar salad dressing recipe that I got from a waiter there years ago AND IT IS PERFECT. I feel weird posting it publicly, but if you love that salad and want to make it at home, I’ll absolutely send it to you if you ask.
Made this halloumi hummus bowl and it was really, really good. Love pearled couscous, love grilled halloumi.
Halloumi hummus bowl
Nathan and I watched Monkey Shine on Pluto and holy shit what a fun movie. Brief plot: It’s about a young athlete who becomes a paralyzed quadriplegic, and develops a bond with an intelligent service monkey named "Ella" who becomes homicidal after she is injected with an experimental serum of human brain tissue. HOW COULD THIS NOT BE AMAZING? It’s not going to sound funny now, but there’s this montage of the monkey doing all sorts of things for the man and then she puts this burrito-thing in the machine holder for him to eat and Nathan said something like, “Here… comes… PITA!” like she was gonna launch it to his mouth and I fucking died laughing. Truly just a fun movie.
Some things that I’d like to do this month: make this burrata mushroom lasagna, I’d love to try this caesar recipe, I intend to finally review last month’s Ipsy bag that I’ve been putting off forever for no good reason, and I’ll likely rewatch the old Cannonball Run movies because I really want to. BIG PLANS.
Also, don’t forget about Mother’s Day on the 10th. Just a reminder. If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in March over here.
