As a Canadian, I often miss proper cheese curds. You know, the Quebecois ones. Those rubbery, delicious little chunks of heaven are often unheard of in these parts, so when I saw them on the menu at The Cellar at Beecher's I had to of course order them. Result? Majestic and fresh as hell. If you haven't had them for awhile (or *shudder* ever) then these are definitely just at good as the ones straight out of Quebec.
“You should be washing your sheets at least twice a month. (I’m looking at you, all men everywhere.)”
Tournesol
I have a new favourite dish and that dish is bœuf bourguignon. If you know how to make this... maybe let me know. I just ate it for the first time at Tournesol in Long Island City in Queens (thanks to the lovely Angela for suggesting we go) and it was transcendent. I promise you. This place is extremely French, lovely and better than any place you frequent so GO RIGHT NOW. And you know how I knew this place would be good? Two reasons.
- The free bread at the beginning of the meal was fresh as hell.
- They gave you BUTTER instead of olive oil with the bread. I can't stand it when olive oil is the only thing accompanying a bread basket. Hate this so much. I don't care how Parisian that is, give me some damn butter. And they do here.
I can't wait to go again. This dish is phenomenal.
(Sidenote: Don't forget about the Movie Wardrobe Sale happening tomorrow (Saturday) in Toronto!)
Lessons of the Week
Here are some things that I learned this week:
- You're not supposed to ever feed your dog grapes. Seriously, don't do it. I read that here, along with many other things that are bad for dogs in general. It can cause kidney failure or make them sick. Stop doing this! I don't care how cute it is to witness!
- The best banana pudding in the world is in the West Village at Magnolia Bakery. (Fuck those cupcakes, go here for pudding!) Can't believe it took me this long to hear about it. Apparently everyone else already knows this. Eat it. Love it. Live it. (photo below)
- Cooked prosciutto IS WAY TASTIER THAN RAW PROSCIUTTO. Why in the hell are people not eating it cooked always? It's eons better! It's like a less fatty, thinner, meatier-tasting bacon. And I love it. I've always tried to coerce myself into loving it raw and why? 'Cause I guess I'm a rube. Never again. Always gonna cook it now.
- Kale can actually be tasty. I've never believed this before (I'm talking years here), because, well, it's putrid and poorly cooked most of the time. But I had some of a wonderfully under-dressed kale caesar salad with bacon last night at Murray's Cheese Bar that was the definition of delightful. I should've been less shocked though since almost everything there is amazing.
Do these seem more like recommendations and less like lessons to you? 'Cause you're wrong. You need to get on all of these things immediately.
There are pieces of cake in it!
Mom Says
Illustration by Andrew Hamm
Illustration by Andrew Hamm
An Old Halloween
“Sometimes I feel like there are birds flying out of me.”
Kashi's Honey Sunshine
I love Kashi. Eating it makes me feel like I might be doing something right with my day. The Island Vanilla one is especially good. This new flavour, however, is god awful. Does not taste like honey nor sunshine. Trust me. Stay away.
Why Burger King's Satisfries Can Eat A Dick
I know you know that I love gravy - this is a fact. But without the existence of French fries, I would not be able to love gravy as much as I do. So I guess you could say that I love fries more than gravy. That being said, I think I have some valid opinions when it comes to these new "satisfries" - ugh, kill me for even typing that word-atrocity. (Sidenote: if you're judging me for loving fries? Well, that's enough of that. You probably love all kinds of trash that some would scoff at, so check the 'tude at the door. I know for a fact that some people will never respect fry-lovers, and that's cool, you're entitled to that opinion. But still, calm it down.)
Why These Fries Are A Dumb Idea
- I'm sorry, but only 30% less calories? What the hell? Not even a round number like 50%? Who the hell cares about eating something with 30% less of anything? THEY ARE STILL FRIES.
- Idiotic name. Sounds like a joke name.
- I am not of this opinion, but some people think Burger King's regular fries are the grossest of all the fast food places. In this case, why didn't Burger King just take their old ones off the menu and go to town with these? I would've at least understood that move. Plus, if BK suddenly really cares about my diet, why the fuck are you still offering me your old fatty, dirt fries? Get rid of them! It angers me to know that they want me in there, DECIDING between the two choices. That really makes me mad for some reason. Don't pander to me, Burger King.
- It also enrages me to think that someone would order these and THEN FEEL GOOD & HEALTHIER ABOUT THEIR DECISION. These are still fucking French fries. You're still a piece of shit for ordering them. (I know this because I am this every now and again, and I am definitely a piece of garbage for ordering them, but at least I'm aware of this.)
People who love and/or eat fries should know that they're awful for you, always. On another note, this trend of making junk food healthy for you is usually just confusing. If you're changing the badness of a product, you have to change the complete name of what it is! For example, a vegetarian "pizza" with only cooked peppers and mushrooms, on a whole wheat tortilla, with NO cheese on it should no longer be considered a pizza. It has become some sort of unholy, vegetable-attacked type of bread. It can still be delicious like a pizza, but IT AIN'T ONE. Come up with a new name and call it that, 'cause that bitch ain't pizza.
This is a lot of complaining. What they really should have done was get rid of the old fries, introduce these news ones as their primary ones, tell you that they're trying to make people consume less fat and say, "Good day." They should've either done that or NOTHING AT ALL - just BE Burger King, the king of burgers, as you so indicate, and continue killing us all slowly. One or the other. Either one I'm totally cool with. But this? No. Just fucking no. Hate all of this. 'Cause if you're walking into any kind of fast food place, you're not getting something that's good for you. I don't care about any of their health conscious menus, it's all a ruse, you're in there? You're dying young.
Boooooo, Burger King. Boo.
A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving
Not the best Charlie Brown special (obviously), but still all right. Also, if you have any nieces or nephews or know any small kids then make them watch this. It brings me down to think that kids today wouldn't watch these specials.
Happy Thanksgiving, Canada!