Michael Bolton in Concert

You're not a fan, you say? Well, get outta this blog, bud. Lotta bolt talk ahead.

I saw this fine man perform this week in Mississauga and if you ever get a chance to see him - GO. He, of course, plays the big hits - but even the songs he does "off his new album" are still covers of other songs from the past, so it's a win-win situation. The only thing I didn't enjoy was the fact that he has two women who come out and do duets with him at various times. And then when he leaves for an outfit change (of which there are three), one of the women would come out and sing a snippet from one of HIS songs! What the hell?! I paid to hear HIM sing it, not you, bitch! Anyway, hated that. But him? He's a gem. A real national treasure. Also, THIS reggae version is too fantastic not to pass on. 

The two remaining tour dates he has lined up are in Snoqualmie, WA on June 15th and in Peachtree City, GA on July 26th and you can find information on them here. 

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Me and my mom AREN'T gonna take an audience shot? Get out of here.

Manhattanhenge

Manhattanhenge: when the sun aligns spectacularly with the NYC street grid.

For 2014 the dates for Manhattanhenge fall on May 29th and July 12th, when the setting Sun aligns precisely with the Manhattan street grid, creating a lovely glow of light across the backdrop of the city, simultaneously illuminating both the north and south sides of every cross street of the borough's grid. 

For these two days, as the Sun sets on the grid, half the disk sits above and half below the horizon. The day after (May 30th) and the day before (July 11) also offer Manhattanhenge moments, but at sunset, you instead will find the entire ball of the Sun on the horizon.

Half Sun on the Grid Times

Thursday, May 29 8:16 P.M. EDT
Saturday, July 12 8:25 P.M. EDT

Full Sun on the Grid Times

Friday, May 30 8:18 P.M. EDT
Friday, July 11 8:24 P.M. EDT

If you're going to check it out, then arrive a half-hour earlier than the times given above.

For best effect, position yourself as far east in Manhattan as possible. But ensure that when you look west across the avenues you can still see New Jersey. Clear cross streets include 14th, 23rd, 34th. 42nd, 57th, and several streets adjacent to them. 

Amy Poehler's Book 'Yes Please'

COMES OUT OCTOBER 28TH, 2014!

As I've mentioned before, I cannot wait for this since it'll likely be FANTASTIC. You can pre-order it on Amazon, if you so choose. 

Gallery Thursday Nights in Chelsea

Museums in New York can be amazing. They can also be pricey (unless you know where to go to pay no admission). If someone's visiting New York, looking for some non-touristy things to do, I will always tell them to go to Chelsea on a Thursday night because they will likely love it. I first went when I was twenty and I'll still agree now that it's such a good way to spend an evening in this city, 

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Every Thursday night between 6pm and 9pm, there are a ridiculous amount of (free) gallery openings in Chelsea. There is such a variety of what's showcased (one place could focus on electronic media and the one next door could be purely installation) and it changes so frequently that you'll rarely see the same thing upon two visits. There's also free wine and sometimes food at all of them, since, well they want you to come. You can take a look at what's scheduled ahead of time at sites like Art Cards or Meet Up - but that isn't really necessary to do since you can just pick a street to start on and walk around from there. Most venues are between 22nd and 27th Streets (and from Seventh Avenue to Tenth Avenue), but there are definitely some more spaces (less congested) spread along the outskirts of Chelsea.

Cherry Blossom Season

The first time I actively sought out some cherry blossoms was last year, and I'm glad I did. Look at that gorgeousness! And late-April is the time that they bloom, so you should try to find out where they're at in your area. What's the purpose of seeing them? I don't know, maybe to inject a little visual beauty into your life? Don't analyze it, just go. 

There's a great (updated) map of what's already bloomed and what hasn't at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden, so you can try to plan the best time to go and see them. And you can find semi-updated information on their blooming status in High Park in Toronto over here. 

Brooklyn Cyclones Hosting A Seinfeld Night on July 5th

Why is this happening? 'Cause dreams do come true. I've been wanting to go to a Cyclones game for years, so this couldn't be a more perfect one to go to. 

"On July 5, 1989, Seinfeld aired on NBC for the first time and 25 years later, the Cyclones will celebrate the show that has left an indelible mark on popular culture. The first 2,500 fans in attendance will receive a Keith Hernandez "Magic Loogie" Bobblehead.  In addition, there will be non-stop Seinfeld themed entertainment from beginning to end. Yada yada yada... you'll have an awesome night." brooklyncyclones.com

What kinds of things?

• MCU Park will be known as Vandelay Industries Park for one night only
• Mailmen in uniform get to throw out a ceremonial first pitch
• Anyone who has a business card indicating that they are in fact a "Latex Salesman" will also receive a free ticket to the game.  If we call the number and it's some apartment on the Upper East Side, you won't qualify for the freebie. 
• Fans can visit the information table for an "airing of grievances"
• Closest to the pin / whale's blow hole competition
• The foul poles will be known as Festivus Poles
• "Low-Talking" PA Announcer
• Elaine Dancing Contest
• Everyone Runs the Bases Post-game (but anyone named Jerry gets a head start)
• Game of "Risk" on the Concourse
• Cereal eating contests
• Anyone named George Costanza will be allowed to join our radio broadcast as a color analyst for an inning
• Players in puffy shirts for batting practice

You probably should get your tickets early, as this night is surely to be one of the most popular of the 2014 season. Single game tickets will go on sale Saturday, May 10th at 10AM.  But if you follow the Cyclones on Facebook or Twitter, you will get access to a special pre-sale before the general public.  For more information please call 718-37-BKLYN.

Honestly, the "Low-Talking PA Announcer" is maybe the best idea in the world. SO EXCITED FOR THIS.

Mets Tickets $3.50 for 50th Anniversary of Shea Stadium

When: The games on Friday April 18th (7:10pm), Saturday April 19th (7:10pm) and Sunday April 20th (1:10pm).

The Mets host the Braves this weekend at Citi Field and in celebration of the 50th Anniversary of Shea Stadium, the prices are what they were in 1964. For $3.50 get a ticket in the Promenade Outfield and for $19.64 sit in a baseline box seat.

With service charges and all, the $3.50 tickets are actually $10.25 for one ticket and the $19.64 tickets are actually $28.14 for one ticket (which is still pretty amazing). You can reserve tickets here.

Rocky The Musical on Broadway

My brother Gary often says that I give everything a good review. He has compared it to when Homer becomes a food critic.

But you know that's not true. I can hate just as strongly as I can love. But that being said - this musical is probably THE BEST THING YOU CAN SEE ON BROADWAY RIGHT NOW.

Really. And I was honestly not expecting this good a time. It totally won me over mid-way through. At intermission, I was all, "Yeah, I get it. It's okay." And then the second act happened and suddenly my face was no longer part of my body - because it was blown away. 

Did I like the movie Rocky? I did, it's a great movie. Am I crazy in love with that movie? No. I have other loves. And that's fine, calm down. My point is that you can still love this production. And if you see it and don't love it? That's... weird. I'll have no idea how to carry on a conversation with you because it was fantastic and should be enjoyed by everyone who sees it.

The sets were better than any I've ever seen on any stage - and maybe that seems abnormal to note, but you'll understand that more if you get a look at them. They're impeccable. The music? Meh. The music really wasn't anything special. And honestly, the fact that the songs weren't great and yet I still had a fun time should speak volumes. Definitely go see this. There are things I want to tell you specifically about why it was so originally well done, but if you're actually considering seeing it then I don't want to be the one to ruin certain cool things that happen when watching. It was such a great time. Go.

You can purchase tickets here. 

IHOP National (Free) Pancake Day

From 7am until 10pm today, IHOP is giving out stacks of free, buttermilk pancakes at all their locations. As you may recall, I'm personally not that into pancakes - but promotional free food? Big fan. 

Fury of the Day - The Academy Awards

It hards to pinpoint exactly why I hate the Academy Awards, but here are a few of the major reasons why I do and why you should, too.

• The red carpet. I get it - people look great, so let's look at them. And good for them! But that's not what this carpet is for - if you've ever actually sat through this awful "pre-show" with a group of people, you are definitely going to hear the likes of, "Fuck, she looks horrible. Look at that hair! That's disgusting," amongst the people you're watching with. Why is this? I don't know, we're all especially mean to people we don't know who have fame and money? And we think we have the RIGHT to criticize these people? That's what I assume, anyway. Which is obviously fucked up.
• The "interviewers" on the red carpet. I hate these people because they're asking questions that absolutely no one gives a fuck about. "Who are you wearing?" Is it just me or does the answer to that question affect me IN NO FUCKING WAY WHATSOEVER? The questions, the answers - I hate them all. And I know that some people watch these "interviews" to see if so-and-so is going to be likable  or a dick, so we can all talk about it later. But the thing is - WE DON'T KNOW THESE PEOPLE. STOP ACTING LIKE WE SHOULD CARE ABOUT WHO THEY ARE AS HUMANS FOR THE THIRTY SECONDS WE'RE SEEING THEM SPEAK. 
• If a certain movie wins, does that make it a better movie? No, of course not. We know this fact already. But the thing is - WE SHOULDN'T CARE WHAT WINS AND WHAT DOESN'T. I think it's pretty clear that we all have pretty differing tastes and so maybe it isn't a crazy idea to each seek out and find our own "best picture" on our own terms. And a small side note: if you only see a movie because it won some award? Go fuck yourself. You're such a huge part of this problem, I have nothing to say to you. 
• Acting doesn't deserve awards. I'm not sorry. It just doesn't. Seeing some great performance doesn't have the ability to wow me for days, maybe that's just me. Even if it did, do these actors deserve this ridiculously lofty, self-centered treatment for the rest of my goddam life? I don't get why we're supposed to pretend as if these people are changing all of our lives. It's art, I get it. But how the hell did acting get so far above any other kind of expressive art?
• The "speeches". I put that in quotations because these are not speeches anymore. I don't know if they ever were, to be honest. These are now thank you acknowledgments. If you look up what the fucking word 'speech' means - it's a goddam "spoken expression of ideas and opinions." If you manage to win an award and go up to that podium, granted, other people helped you get there. But the other fucking billion percent of people who are watching you up there don't really give a fuck about those thanked people. It would make so much more sense to say something that would maybe, I don't know, inspire the tons of people giving you their attention at that moment in time? Or say something that shows how happy you are! Share something insightful to help express your gratitude! Say SOMETHING that makes you human for a minute and that can be shared amongst your "fans" and audience. And what I really don't get? These people who love watching the Oscars - aren't they pissed with all the thanking they have to hear? Do they ENJOY this part?! What the fuck are they getting out of this?! WHY ARE YOU WATCHING THIS SO INTENTLY?! 
• The length of the whole thing. I've said this before,and I'll say it again. This entire awards ceremony feels like thousands of rich, entitled, (dominantly) white people jacking each other off continuously for about four hours intercut with commercial breaks for us to casually bask in their supreme greatness - and we, the viewers, are all supposed to lovingly froth at the mouth and collectively watch every fucking second of it, and then talk about it endlessly the next day to one another. WHAT IS HAPPENING?! HOW IS THIS THE WORLD?!
• The fact that these shit shows are televised is the part that makes me over-the-top mad. If they weren't broadcasted to us at all? Who knows how I might feel in that case. 

And I'm only singling out the Academy Awards because they're happening this weekend - ALL awards shows for television/movies/music are equally terrible. I only wish that they would stop airing them for us to see. All of these shows are wasting our time and their time so equally. Please stop watching, you're better than that.