August Actions 2020

by Liz Heather in , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

First things first, welcome to (under normal circumstances) the best time of the year. Will this perfect time of year be different than previous years? Of course. We’re all still trying to function in this modern version of hell. SO that being said, I am still going to try and make the most of the seasonal things I like to do (minus seeing the people that I love and haven’t seen for almost a year, eating the baked goods from places that I’m not allowed to visit, or being able to just hug my family). MINUS ALL OF THAT. I will cook what I cannot go out to eat. I will watch the movies in my home that I’d normally insist on watching with others. I will decorate. I will light all of the autumn-scented candles that I can get my grubby hands on. Autumn will happen and I will do the best that I can. And I encourage you to do the same. Here’s what happened last month:

  • Two more songs that I love off of Taylor Swift’s new album: epiphany and mad woman. It’s fast becoming my album of the summer (I’m, like, super indie, I know).

  • Blue Diamond has these flavoured almonds out right now and the salt & vinegar as well as the dill pickle flavours… are insanely good.

  • I sent this to my mom and she loved it as much as I do (below).

Scott Hubbard (@scottyhubs) has created a short video on TikTok with music sonido original. | This was in my drafts 😂 #fyp #tiktokpets #dog #cosplay

  • I tried samples of the Verb Ghost Shampoo, Hair Mask and Spray and they were all equal parts bullshit. Who sends out a spray sample in a small packet, so that it can’t be sprayed? Ignoring the idiotic packaging, the products themselves just fell flat. Absolutely nothing special here.

  • I tried Ops Pizza in Brooklyn and it was great! Better than Prince Street or Mama’s Too? Not a chance. Still good, though.

  • My friend Dusty has a movie premiering at TIFF! Too incredible.

  • I finally got to eat the tomato focaccia from Lilia and now I can’t get it off my mind and have to go get it again before summer is over.

View this post on Instagram

Tomato focaccia @caffelilia #KeepItSimple

A post shared by Lilia Ristorante (@lilianewyork) on

  • I bought this mask off of Etsy in anticipation of October’s arrival.

  • I also got this Tan Lines candle that smells incredible. I know it’s basic as hell but candles might be saving my life.

  • I tried beef carpaccio for the first time (!) at L’Artusi and it was great! I’d describe it as a lighter, more dainty steak tartare.

  • I also tried the vegan chicken parm sandwich at VSPOT and dear lord was it good. Tasted exactly like a regular chicken parm. Must remember this place and go again.

Oneya (@angryreactions) has created a short video on TikTok with music original sound. | #duet with @bobbysrey that cake is beautiful. #fyp #foryou

  • Some movies that I rewatched: It’s Complicated (the family of children is so annoying in this movie, but I love all of the adults and the food and it’s just comforting to watch) and Adventures in Babysitting (a perfect movie).

  • I started rewatching Moesha and it’s great to see again, but I can’t believe I didn’t notice how incredible the side character of Kim is! She holds the show together! Obviously, this realization makes me excited for when her spinoff show The Parkers comes to Netflix next month.

  • I bought this strawberry shampoo from The Body Shop (impulse buy for $5) and the smell reminds me so much of being in middle school (meaning this in a good way). Is it a great shampoo? Meh.

  • I tried a decent sized sample of the moisturizing cream from Sunday Riley and the best part about it is the smell. I can’t imagine a world in which I’d pay $65 for a basic moisturizer, though, so that says it all.

  • Forever in love with this summer panzanella salad.

  • I tried that anchovy pasta that Mindy Kaling recommended and it’s basic as hell, wouldn’t make again.

  • I made my first purchase from Everlane and the quality of the shirt is beautiful, if not a little shapeless. Will I buy from them again? Probably not. It’s just so bland for the price point.

  • New songs I keep playing on repeat: Surrender by Natalie Taylor, Savage by Megan Thee Stallion, and (*drops head*) this dance remix to a Taylor Swift song (stop judging me).

  • I own it already, but I’m so happy to hear that Safety Not Guaranteed is back on Netflix. Everyone should watch it. The ending is amazing.

  • I’m using the new Trader Joe’s Strawberry Lemon Sugar Scrub and does it do anything magical? Not really. The smell is incredible, but there’s something gross about the little strawberry seeds in the scrub. No thanks.

  • New watch alert! $25 at Nordstrom. I’ve been making fun of Nathan having a gold watch for some time now and then realized it might be because I was jealous and wanted one of my own. So here we are.

  • Idea: take hot baths in the summer. I never used to do this and it’s so relaxing. It doesn’t make any sense.

  • I tried the vegan burger patties from Trader Joe’s and they’re only okay, I wouldn’t get them again. The Impossible Burger is hands down the best one I’ve tried, with a close second place to the Beyond Burger.

  • I love this idea for basil breadcrumbs on top of a lasagna.

  • The Met reopened (as well as their rooftop installation) and I can’t bring myself to go. I know they’re taking precautions and all, but I just don’t want to do it. It does look incredible, though.

  • I tried the brunch burger at Vite Vinosteria in Astoria and I know I say this a lot, but holy shit. Might be the best burger in Astoria? What the hell is with Italian restaurants having these sleeper hit burgers all of a sudden? Vesta is the same way! Either way, I’m not complaining. I mean, look at this beast.

Brunch burger at Vite Vinosteria in Astoria

  • I started a Might Buy bookmark category in my browser window, to cut down on impulse buying and really care about what I spend my money on. Here’s a list of things that I can’t decide if I want to buy or not:

Some things I’m looking forward to this month: I think I’m going to start rewatching Friday Night Lights, I’m also working on my October list of what to watch each day that month, I’m so excited that Ijeoma Oluo’s new book has a release date of December 2020, and I’m excited to finish the new book I’m reading (that you’ll be hearing about imminently).

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in July over here.

July Jiffs 2020

by Liz Heather in , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

This was me all month.

giphy.gif

The key word being was. We bought an air conditioner! We’ve been an A/C-free family for some time now, but since we’re spending so much time at home, we figured now was the time to be cool. In other news, everything still blows! What a shock! Here’s how I spent July.

  • I didn’t even know another Halloween movie was being made but of course I’ll go see it even if it turns out to be trash, you gotta support classic horror franchises, that’s just basic horror etiquette 101.

  • This is the most basic, boring-sounding sandwich on planet earth, but it tastes incredible I promise you (I didn’t add bacon, but I did add fresh mozzarella) and whatever bread you use, it’ll still be great. I find myself constantly forgetting about the greatness of mayo because I, my dear, am an idiot.

  • I ordered a bunch of new address labels on Zazzle because they were having a Christmas in July sale, so I bought some seasonally inspired labels to use over the next few months. If you’re not seasonally co-ordinating your return address labels, are you even living?

  • I’m still doing Nathan’s podcast on Patreon incase you’re interested. (You can find more clips on his Instagram.)

  • I attempted to watch the new Baby-Sitter’s Club on Netflix and it’s really not meant for me. I was never into the books or the movie or any of it, I never liked the idea of kids caring about making money, it seemed too sad to me. “Just be a kid!” I’d always thought.

  • Speaking of childhood nostalgia, I have started to watch reruns online of Sweet Valley High, which I loved as a kid. It’s no Breaker High, but it’s still pretty great to rewatch. God, Jessica really was an absolute bitch.

  • Some other things that I’ve rewatched: Con Air (practically a perfect movie, will always love, *Nic Cage forever* might be the only tattoo I’d ever get), Supermarket Sweep is on American Netflix and I was so excited (for about three episodes) then I moved on with my life, Sleepless in Seattle (still a very nice, average, reliable movie), Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (actually a really great summer movie, will always be a fun time to watch, will forever be a huge Keanu fan, I just feel like I could trust him??), and Dick Tracy (will always love this movie even if it has eight million too many montages, the set design is gorgeous, and this one outfit that Madonna wears makes me question… everything).

  • Some new movies that I’ve watched: Always Be My Maybe (so, so great! How did it take me so long to see this! So many good scenes, such a good movie), The Karate Kid (insane that I hadn’t seen it before, kids were uncomfortably mean in the 80s, favourite part was when Mr. Miyagi beats up the children, great movie), The Stepfather (pretty fun time, so happy we’ve starting watching horror movies again), Eat Pray Love (ugh, I don’t know, I do love movies about women just leaving and doing fun shit alone and abandoning their lives, but this was pretty lame, I hated James Franco’s character more than life and truly didn’t understand how Julia Roberts was even briefly into him), and finally the original The Hills Have Eyes (which I loved weirdly enough despite being incredibly tense the entire movie, I just thought it was so well done and scary and incredible, the rape scene is of course awful and I shut my eyes for that part, but that was the only thing I hated, it doesn’t make sense that I liked this movie so much).

  • I don’t know how to word this, but something is off with the reasonably priced (and almost too cheap) parmesan sold at Trader Joe’s. It melts weird. It doesn’t taste like normal cheese. Something is afoot and I won’t buy it any longer. I’m truly dreading and equally anticipating the day that all of Trader Joe’s secrets are exposed. Be warned.

  • That being said, obviously I’m in love with the seasonal summer candles that TJ just released. We have a complicated relationship.

Trader Joe summer candle trio, 2020

  • I made this gruyere mac and cheese with caramelized onions (I used almond milk and it still came out good) and can every recipe just include caramelized onions? The world is ending, let’s just put sweet, tiny, brown onions on everything and call it a day.

  • Ennio Morricone passed away last month and I find myself listening to the Cinema Paradiso soundtrack on repeat.

  • Read this great piece about summer blockbuster movies which also has just some great ideas for movies to rewatch right now.

  • I have to remember that Essie’s vibrant colours just f-ing suck. Only their muted/bland colours are good. They should really just stick to those. And if you’re looking for loud colours that stand out, the summer collection at Urban Outfitters is my go-to (and there’s always a 3 for $10 sale with them).

  • I listened to Taylor Swift’s new album and so far my favourites are definitely: the 1 and this is me trying.

  • Ugh, Astoriaaaaaa, DO BETTER.

  • I’ve been thinking about cancelling my Ipsy subscription again (because I think I don’t care about makeup at this current moment in time) and when I logged on to cancel, they let me choose one of the items being sent next month as if they knew I wanted to leave! So I chose a Sunday Riley product (because any sample I’ve tried from them, I’ve loved) so maybe I’ll cancel next month?

  • I tried a sample of Drunk Elephant’s shampoo & conditioner (which smelled so lovely) and my hair did seem softer the next day. There’s something about this brand though, I feel like they might be tricking us with their beautiful packaging and minimalist persona.

  • I bought and tried the ancient Biore Strips and I have absolutely no idea if they did what they’re supposed to do. Are you supposed to see the blackheads or whiteheads come off onto the strip? It felt like it just tried to peel my face off. No idea what’s going on with these.

  • I have been in love with the Peter Thomas Roth Correction Pads, I use one pad before bed each night and I think they’re doing something good because I always wake up with no new pimples. It has even started erasing all of the redness I’ve been experiencing lately from the summer heat and sweat and mask-wearing. At this point, I can definitely see myself rebuying when I run out, and if I do then I’ll definitely not get them from Sephora because you can get them way cheaper at other online retailers.

  • I’ve also started using this Dr. Dennis Gross All-In-One face cleanser and I think it’s a good one. It’s hard to tell because I started using it the same day at the correction pads I mentioned above (yes that was a bad idea but here we are), so maybe they’re working together to make my face good? We’ll revisit this.

  • I finally opened up this Belif set I bought a few months ago and it’s really nothing special. I think the face cream is probably the best item in there because you truly don’t need to use a lot to feel moisturized. But the face cleanser? Meh. I don’t think it does very much, it definitely didn’t help any redness. And the toner? Don’t get me started on how I kind of think toner might be a scam. And the “eye moisturizer”? Seems superfluous. My eye area is plenty moist, thanks.

  • Perfect summer soap scent: Fresh Rainfall. If I can’t travel this year, I will escape into this scent. (Send help.)

  • Very excited to hear about Lindy West’s new book.

View this post on Instagram

IT’S FINALLY HERE!!! This is the official cover for my next book, Shit, Actually, which you can preorder now and receive in Oct! I am SO EXCITED TO RELEASE THIS BOOK. Obviously Shrill changed my life and I worked harder on The Witches Are Coming than anything I’ve ever made, but frankly Shit, Actually is my favorite because it is just me in my purest form: being a bitch about movies. It was so therapeutic to write this book, a kind of return to myself and my beginnings, and it absolutely saved me to just sit and make myself laugh, day after day, during the early pandemic. I cannot wait for you to read this. (And let’s sell the shit out of it so I can write 10 sequels!) Also no joke I deserve a Grammy for the audiobook. 💖 ###### // New York Times opinion writer and bestselling author Lindy West was once the in-house movie critic for Seattle’s alternative newsweekly The Stranger, where she covered film with brutal honesty and giddy irreverence. In Shit, Actually, Lindy returns to those roots, re-examining beloved and iconic movies from the past 40 years with an eye toward the big questions of our time: Is Twilight the horniest movie in history? Why do the zebras in The Lion King trust Mufasa-WHO IS A LION-to look out for their best interests? Why did anyone bother making any more movies after The Fugitive achieved perfection? And, my god, why don’t any of the women in Love, Actually ever fucking talk?!?! From Forrest Gump, Honey I Shrunk the Kids, and Bad Boys II, to Face/Off, Top Gun, and The Notebook, Lindy combines her razor-sharp wit and trademark humor with a genuine adoration for nostalgic trash to shed new critical light on some of our defining cultural touchstones-the stories we’ve long been telling ourselves about who we are. At once outrageously funny and piercingly incisive, Shit, Actually reminds us to pause and ask, “How does this movie hold up?”, all while teaching us how to laugh at the things we love without ever letting them or ourselves off the hook. Shit, Actually is a love letter and a break-up note all in one: to the films that shaped us and the ones that ruined us. More often than not, Lindy finds, they’re one and the same.

A post shared by Lindy West (@thelindywest) on

  • So I heard that Lady M now ships their cakes to Canada and I was able to scream in excitement for approx. four seconds before looking into it and seeing that it’ll cost you over $100 to get ONE cake sent. THE GALL, I tell you. THE GALL.

  • I briefly looked into the app Sweatcoin after hearing good things, but it really just seems like an app where its main goal is to track you. And yes, your phone already does that whether you’re aware or not, but I think I’ll pass on the extra tracking.

  • I heard that the upcoming Halloween Bob’s Burgers episode will “follow the kids as they try to deliver a burger to the hotel on their street.” It’s such a sad little bit of tiny information, but I love their seasonal episodes so much that I’ll take any crumbs available.

  • Actually helpful tips on how to clean your home efficiently.

  • Christ, why do I keep forgetting that Bareburger is absolutely nothing special? Why in the good fuck is it taking so long for a Shake Shack to come to Astoria?!

  • I ate on the patio at Hoja Santa in Astoria and the tacos were nothing to write home about. The service, drinks and chips were outstanding though, so I may have just ordered badly.

  • New favourite beer alert.

  • Best tweets of the month ahead.

  • I tried Thai iced coffee and it was so wildly sweet and too aromatic, I probably wouldn’t get it again. And I also tried a Vietnamese iced coffee and it was the perfect level of sweet! What’s the difference between the two, you ask?

  • I finally tried the katsu sandwich at Hi-Collar as takeout in the East Village and it was absolutely nothing special. No idea why people are so into it.

  • I haven’t been to Bite in so many months, so it was nice to get takeout earlier this week. God how I’ve missed their ciabatta bread. They use it on their sandwiches and it comes from Balthazar each morning and it’s always heavenly.

  • I have found the perfect, light summer blanket and I’m trying not to focus on the fact that it came from Amazon.

  • I tried a grapefruit shandy and holy shit, it might be my favourite new summer drink.

  • I ate on the patio at L’Artusi since it just reopened and good god, that carbonara will change you. So psyched to see they have the wagyu steak tartare on the menu now, too. The burger, the panzanella salad and the charred corn were all great, but that carbonara was the standout.

Yeah, I’m NOT gonna get a Manhattan??

Carbonara heaven, 'L’Artusi

L’Burger with roasted potatoes at L’Artusi

Sweet Irene!

Some things I’d like to do this month: I’d love to try this tomato toast with blue cheese mayo, I’m going to start using a new clothes steamer I just bought with the hopes of getting rid of my iron & ironing board, I rebought a tube of Revitalash because of how great my lashes were looking when I used it a few years ago so I’ll start using it on August 1st and track my progress to prove how great this product is, I can’t wait for Moesha to be coming to Netflix this month, and I am waiting waiting waiting until I can find time to return to Lilia (on the patio) to eat this incredible tomato focaccia & garlic butter (shown below).

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in June over here.

February Feats 2020

by Liz Heather in , , , , , , , ,

I write this from underneath two blankets, perched atop three pillows. This is day three of being sick (Nathan just joined me in illness yesterday) and I think I’m getting better but that could just be blind hope. In any case, I still have to tell you what went on last month. Forgive the tone of this post, it might be… affected.

  • I heard that Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker are going to be in the Paul Simon play Plaza Suite together and so I casually thought “Ooo, might be nice to catch” so I looked it up and tickets START at $700. So I guess fuck me then. I swear to god, this fucking city.

  • The best cover so far this year:

Brian Stauffer, The New Yorker

  • I rewatched a movie I love: The Door In The Floor and it really holds up well. Kim Basinger and Jeff Bridges and both too good at what they do. Love this movie so much.

  • I rewatched The Evil Dead and look I understand it’s probably a “good horror movie” especially for its time and budget, but I fucking hated it, maybe even more so than the last time that I saw it. Never again. Why do I keep rewatching things that I hate? I don’t have to like everything. I must repeat this to myself daily.

  • I had lunch at Daily Provisions and their lemon cruller was really good and light and the chicken club sandwich was good, too. Always a solid morning/afternoon place.

  • Favourite tweets of the month:

  • I tried Trader Joe’s Whole Wheat Couscous and maaaaan, it was so good. So I guess all couscous is good? Gotta get my hands on that pearly couscous. That seems like the money cousocus.

  • I made this Greek Couscous Salad for lunches for a week and didn’t get sick of it at all, I gotta remember to keep this in the rotation. I also kept the salad and the couscous separate until I wanted to eat, and then I’d join them together.

  • I can’t believe I hadn’t seen this sketch before (calling someone a “goofy bitch” just about killed me), also ignore how bad an actress Cardi B is:

  • I finished watching The Good Place and yes it was a good show. I don’t think l liked it as much as pretty much everyone else in my life who loved it, but it was definitely a good show. This scene was the best part of the finale, for sure. That song used in the scene will always elicit tears, I remember falling in love with it when it was used in the movie that everyone hated but me, Swept Away.

  • Again, I visited Everlane and it still disappoints. Why do I keep thinking it’ll be different each time? What the fuck is wrong with me?

  • I saw Parasite and it was wonderful and everyone who hasn’t seen it should see it. I haven’t heard from one person who didn’t like it. Universally liked!

  • I listened to the new Strokes single and hated it, so that’s something. Growth?

  • I haven’t seen the whole episode yet, but I really liked RuPaul’s SNL monologue.

  • Why isn’t everyone putting pickles on grilled cheese? Makes no sense. Fucking taste explosion.

  • I finally tried the (off-menu, must be requested when it’s not brunch) Cacio E Pepe at L’Artusi and holy christ, it might be better than their mushroom ragu. I KNOW. Such wild developments! (They also started serving at lunch, but only lunch delivery, not dine-in. SO this means nothing to me.)

  • I think I will officially stop buying candles from Bath & Body Works. The ones at Marshalls are cheaper, last longer and the variety of scents is endless. I have a candle from Marshalls right now simply called STORM and it really does kinda smell like stormy weather. Obviously I’m waiting for a thunderstorm to light that mother. I have mental issues?

  • I watched the newest season of Shrill (no big spoilers ahead) and loved it, obviously. The disappointing-ness of parents is so nicely shown (that moment at the restaurant when she asks her dad what he thinks of her boyfriend and he’s so indifferent, ugh so perfect), I absolutely LOVED the wedding episode (infact all of the episodes following that one are the best ones, I think I just love the episodes not centered about this not-great relationship with her and her boyfriend), the WEHAM episode is perfect (finally someone making fun of makeup for for legs), and I continue to love the character Fran. Really hoping for a third season, especially based on the season finale.

  • Don’t ask me why, but I watched most of the Police Academy movies and I think the Miami one might be the best one?? I couldn’t make it twenty minutes into the Moscow one, so I feel like you might want to trust me when I say that I know what I’m talking about.

  • These are my new favourite leggings of all time, they feel like you’re wearing nothing at all.

  • Cannot get over the beauty of these women and these outfits.

Camila Mendes

Nyma Tang

  • I watched the Michelle Carter documentary and I don’t know how other people feel, but it’s absolutely unreal that she was found guilty. Of course Nathan disagrees.

  • I ate at Frank for the first time in over a decade with the one and only Irene and it’s still great. Love that they do the opposite of al dente pasta here. Photos below.

Tagliatelle special

Roasted garlic bread

Mushroom pappardelle special

  • I can’t find a link for them online, but I bought some reusable Leak Proof Snack Bags by Kitchen Details at Nordstrom Rack and they’re perfect since we typically use a million of those disposable ones for holding sunflower seeds and almonds

  • I threw out a lot of clothing/shoes/bags, so I went out and bought some things that I absolutely love. I now have a faux fur, brown evening coat that I’ve long dreamed of owning, a new everyday purse, a vintage, gold, mesh evening purse, new everyday shoes, more sunglasses and some new wedges that may or may not replace the older wedges I’ve had since 2006 (the ones lovingly referred to as my Terminators because of the massive fall that I took in them upon exiting the movie Terminator Salvation). I could show you all of the new pieces, but I’d much rather slide into a room you’re in to show you my new fur coat. However if it annoys you not to see any of these new things that bring my joy, here are two of them.

Classic Reeboks from DSW

I also got them in blue

  • I’ve actually started using tiny drops of facial oil mixed with my nighttime face lotion and even though I’ve only just started to do this, my face is already way less dry when waking up. I don’t know if I can do this in the hotter weather, but for now I’ll keep it up.

  • I know all of these are old songs, but I recently heard and fell in love with this Taylor Swift song. And this one. And this one. Oh and this one too.

  • I went to Giorgio’s of Gramercy again (the last time was a few years ago with Nathan) and it’s still great! I haven’t had a steak in awhile, but the one here? Holy hell. Magnificent.

  • I went to see the new Kubrick 2001 exhibit at the Museum of the Moving Image and it was pretty neat. They have one of his Oscars on display in a case, which was actually really cool to see.

  • I read and reviewed a biography of Johnny Carson that truly sucked.

  • So Nathan and I are in the middle of watching McMillion$ and can I just say: boooooooooooooooo. I’ve never seen a “documentary” more over-produced, self-indulgent, superfluous and WILDLY overdone. It’s a bloody six part series that could’ve EASILY been an hour and a half movie. If you ever need proof of a documentary having too much money spend, my god have you found it. Of COURSE Mark Wahlberg has something to do with it, this man needs to fucking STOP. I know they are countless other men attached to the project too, but it’s much easier to shit on just him. God, what a waste of time. The Wikipedia page is more succinct.

  • I watched To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before 2: P.S. I Still Love You and it was everything I wanted it to be and more. Loved the Adventures in Babysitting reference right off the top (I’ll forever love that movie and it doesn’t get talked about enough), I loved pretty much every musical choice (these are my top three songs from the movie), and I loved the idea of doing another Thanksgiving in March (although I’m pretty sure Chrissy Teigen did this a few years ago and planted that great seed in my head). Definitely the best thing on Netflix at the moment.

  • Seeing this restored footage of NYC in 1911 is both exciting and eerie as hell, for some reason.

  • Nathan and I went to the Raptors game that ended their winning streak, sorry about that.

  • I’ve been consumed with reading so much stuff about what’s going on right now and this was a little helpful: 4 Practical Ways to Prepare Your Home for a Pandemic. Don’t judge me for sharing this link! I’m delirious.

    Things that I’m looking forward to this month: visiting Collingwood and going skiing with my family, I might splurge and get that mini birthday cake from Momofuku Milk Bar, and the new season of On My Block comes out on the 11th. I’m pretty into the idea of turning 35, usually I’m more jacked about my birthday month but I think I’m too down to care at the moment. Caring coming soon.

    If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in January over here.

January Jewels 2020

by Liz Heather in , , , , , , , , ,

I’ve purposely put off writing this monthly wrap-up because, well, christ. January was a terrible month. I don’t need to go into the details of why, but the consensus from everyone that I’ve talked to fully agrees with me on this. What the hell happened? Starting a new decade is supposed to be great. In any case, I’ll always have high hopes for the future. And I’m just thankful to begin a new month. Here’s what went down in the pit that was January 2020.

  • First things first, I recapped how my 2019 resolutions turned out. Why don’t more people do this? Where’s the accountability in reviewing your past resolutions? They’re not fucking birthday wishes, they’re intentions! More people need to follow through with this, even if the results aren’t what you hoped for.

  • I made my 2020 resolutions.

  • I fell absolutely in love with this sketch.

  • I did two podcasts with Nathan - one where we talked about the pope incident and one where I absolutely scream at him about Hillary.

  • I read Jenny Slate’s new book as well as a tiny little book about how to live a good life.

  • I ended up buying another J. Crew swimsuit (the same one I bought a few months ago, but this time in red) and I have no regrets.

  • In love with Trader Joe’s (dairy free) coconut whipped cream, I can’t stop using it in hot chocolate.

  • I rewatched (or watched for the first time, I truly can’t remember) The Staircase and it’s so good. I’m pretty sure Marla got me MP3 copies of this years ago and I did watch it, but I completely forgot about it in detail. Such a good watch. If you’ve already seen it, do you know about the owl theory? It’s a wild one, but, like, I think an owl did it now?

  • I’ve been using a small bottle of OUAI’s Wave Spray and if I can figure out how to not overspray it, it’s a great product. Once you use it though, your hair only looks good that day. After you sleep on it, your hair looks like shit. (Is that true of all hair products? I have absolutely no idea.)

  • Bought this Banana Republic top for $13 on sale and I love it because it does not feel like it cost so little.

  • I don’t know if it’s a Canadian brand but I have found a wicked alternative to Dollarama: Buck or Two. I went to one in Brampton and they’ve got everything.

  • I watched most of the SNL with Jennifer Lopez and wow did it suck. 99% of the sketches were basically “She’s pretty. That’s the joke.” Fucking hated it. They do this a lot of the time with certain actresses and I can’t ever tell if it’s because the actress loves doing these sketches or they’re afraid she can’t be funny. Whatever the reason is, blow my brains out, please.

  • I went to the Ear Inn in the city and it was lovely! Super old place. Service was great. Burger was great.

  • I went to Glossier with the intention of buying the cheek stain and then decided against it. It’s not a good product. I literally pinched my cheeks and got a better rosiness.

  • I came across probably my favourite winter children’s book of all time, The Snowman by Raymond Briggs. Look at one page of this magic.

  • I was so happy to hear about this matter finally being settled in New York.

  • I went to The Dutch again for Restaurant Week for their steak tartare and it’s just heaven on a plate.

  • I rewatched the great What Lies Beneath and man, it’s still just such a great movie.

  • As you may have heard, Papyrus is going out of business, so I’ve popped in twice to see what the closing deals are and they aren’t worth it yet (only 30% off! C’mon! I won’t get out of bed for at least 60%), so I’ll keep stopping in every so often until they’ve become desperate.

  • Love this part of a recent SNL (below). (If you can’t see it in Canada, search for “white male rage SNL.”)

  • I finally went to Boulud Sud for their pasta happy hour and man was it not worth it. The place has a terrible setup if you’re sitting at the bar, the food was absolutely nothing special and had ridiculous portion sizes. It’s also a bad sign when the bread is tastier than the entree. Super disappointing.

  • I tried on the bras and underwear from LIVELY in Soho and even though it’s priced reasonably, I couldn’t find anything I loved. I have a feeling that I could be into it though, so I’ll go again sometime in the future for sure.

  • I’ll forever love the lunch special at Pil Pil on the Upper East Side. I know I probably bring this up too much, but man. Love tapas.

  • I can’t stop buying sunglasses for sale at ALDO. And I won’t.

  • I finished season one of The West Wing and it was really good. I keep forgetting about it, but I should stick with it. People, like, loved that show, didn’t they?

  • I started using Sol De Janeiro’s Bum Bum Cream… on my butt. That’s what it’s for, no? So far, I mean… it feels smooth? It’s not at all greasy, which I like. Seems weird to have a cream just for your butt, but who am I to criticize.

  • Ate the fish tacos at Summer Salt and they’re good! It’s insane and great that they sell margaritas at a fast casual place, too.

  • Very into this Pat McGrath mascara that I got as a Sephora reward.

  • Love this Wells For Boys sketch (below) from a few years ago that I just saw for the first time (thanks for showing me, Irene!)

  • I haven’t been there in years, but I went to Sweet Afton for happy hour in Astoria the other day and had the pickle martini which actually wasn’t terrible. Love that place.

  • Tried the lunch burger at Peter Luger finally! And yes it was a good burger (love that they use American cheese and the bun was very good even though it's not a potato bun). Steakhouse burgers are always hard for me to rate since a steakhouse burger is a real *entree* unlike the regular, everyday burgers that other places have which are not as big and overwhelming. An everyday burger is easy to rate since it's either great, overrated or shit. A steakhouse burger has nuances, how juicy is too juicy? How's the quality of the meat? What are the ideal toppings? Should someone shoot me for my extensive burger thoughts? Yes.

  • I went to see a free orchestral performance put on by Julliard at Lincoln Center and it was great. It reminded me so much of going to my brother Gary’s recitals when I was a kid, just loved it.

  • Had dinner at Portale. The pasta was insane. This place might be a rival for L’Artusi! Dare I say it! Every bite was phenomenal. MUST return. (Noteworthy: it also just got two stars in the Times.)

  • LOVED this piece about Ricky Gervais and the Golden Globes. Favourite line: “The least risky thing in the world is announced apathy.“

  • Maybe you don’t know this, but 90% of post offices in the U.S. have bulletproof glass between the workers and the customers. It’s obviously because awful things have happened, but I’ve been going to this one post office in the city on 23rd street that doesn’t have the glass and the workers are SO MUCH MORE PLEASANT. I wish all locations were like this one. Just a thought.

  • Just bought another one of these UNIQLO shirts that I love in dark grey.

  • Every January I make sure to:

    • Mark down all holidays/birthdays/anniversaries (Valentine’s Day, Daylight Saving Times, Easter, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Thanksgiving)

    • Check expiration dates for passport/license/health card/insurance and write down any important renewal dates

  • I’ve watched the first two new episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm and it fucking blows. There was only one thing I laughed at (when a server thought Larry was “oggling” her but he was really just keeping an eye on her tray with pigs in blankets) but OTHER THAN THAT, what a piece of shit season so far! I fucking hated the part in one episode where he videotapes the consent given between him and some woman as they’re making out. ALSO, and this has happened a few times over the seasons, he’s recycling fucking Seinfeld jokes. FROM THE SHOW. Talking about when it’s too late to get “Happy New Year-ed”? Are we kidding here?! Fucking lazy as hell. I might just stop watching.

  • I watched the new Taylor Swift documentary on Netflix and it’s really good. Even if you have zero opinion on her, I really liked it. (It also introduced me to this great song.)

Things that I’m looking forward to this month: seeing a Raptors game at Barclays Center, finally sitting down and watching season two of Shrill in its entirety, reading Joan Rivers’ book Enter Talking and and maybe going to another Restaurant Week lunch before the end date. February, please oh please don’t be as terrible as January.

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in December over here!

September Shenanigans 2019

by Liz Heather in , , , , , , , ,

This is how I feel about the beginning of October.

skeleton.gif

To put it mildly, I’m excited. But before we start the greatest time of the year, here’s what went down in September!

  • I can’t seem to stop going to L’Artusi in the West Village, I might have a problem. This will be the only place I take all visitors for pasta from here onward. Recently I went to try this beast (shown below): the summer ricotta gnudi with chanterelles, sweet corn and chilies. They also had their wagyu steak tartare as a special (they do this every once in awhile) and it’s by far the best steak tartare in this damn city. SO GOOD. And since summer was still well under way, I also got the corn with pepperoni, chilies and scallion ash as a side dish. (What the hell is scallion ash? Absolutely couldn’t tell you, but I gobbled it up.) SIDENOTE: I still can’t stop making their mushroom ragu at home. I tried it with Banza and holy shit, it was still good. I think I’ll be taking a break from making it any time soon since I’ve made it approximately 12,000 times, but you should definitely try it out if you haven’t already.

  • I’ve made this Crispy Balsamic Chicken a few times now because it’s insanely easy to make and comes together crazy fast. Also, I think I’ve learned the secret to crispy skin every time: PAT THE CHICKEN TOTALLY DRY! Maybe everyone knew this already, but I certainly did not.

  • Nathan and I saw It: Chapter Two and loved it! I wasn’t expecting to since the first one is so great, but I might have liked this one even better! Also, hot tip: you know the Chinese restaurant they’re eating at in the beginning of the movie? Apparently (sources say) that was filmed inside the Mandarin on Matheson in Mississauga! That’s my Mandarin! I’m definitely going to ask about it the next time I’m there, because if that’s true that is MADNESS. So cool.

anigif_sub-buzz-12656-1557421673-1.gif

  • Since horror movie season has begun, Nathan and I watched Halloween 2 and Halloween 3: Season of the Witch and you know what? Not terrible! I remember seeing them as a teenager and bitching about how lame they were, but I was just acting my age, I think. Solid ass movies.

  • We also watched Psycho II and Psycho III and thought the same thing! Great movies! Okay, not great - but definitely not bad. Psycho II was a delight. We’re not better than horror sequels, people. We might think we are, but we ain’t.

  • I tried the new eyebrow pencil from Fenty and even though it’s a good product, it’s definitely not worth $20. I could get three Colourpop ones for less than that and it’s pretty much an identical product.

  • I’m a stone cold sucker for new Trader Joe’s products, so obviously I tried the new Organic Sparkling Apple Cider Drinking Vinegars and they. were. delicious. Both flavours. Insanely good.

  • I have been on a mission to find yellow underwear lately and finally found the motherlode at PINK. Yes, I hate that it’s part of the Victoria’s Secret brand, but I’m still on the hunt. Recommendations welcome.

  • I watched the new, short 9/11 documentary In the Shadow of the Towers: Stuyvesant High about the kids who went to school near the towers and it was really well done. Obviously incredibly sad, but I can’t help but watch any new 9/11 stuff that comes out for some reason.

  • I also watched Chelsea Handler’s new documentary about white privilege and parts of it were good, while other parts just made me roll my eyes a lot. The fact that there’s ever even a debate about white privilege will forever blow my mind. I get what she was trying to do with this project, but it kind of just missed the mark ultimately.

  • I finally wrote about my experience at the new TWA Hotel at JFK.

  • I have been toasting garlic and breadcrumbs in a saucepan until it’s lightly golden brown and then adding it as a heavy garnish to my pasta dishes lately and… I think I’m a new woman. Tastes unreal.

  • Here are some of my favourite photos from the summer and yes it looks like I love summer but I still think it’s the worst season, I promise you.

  • I wrote about our trip to Vermont last month.

  • I assessed how many things got done off of my summer list.

  • I rarely listen to new, whole albums anymore because… actually I don’t know why I don’t do that anymore. But people really wouldn’t shut up about Taylor Swift’s Lover, so I listened to it on Spotify and it was actually pretty good. Not all of it, god no. But my favourites include: Cruel Summer, The Archer and Paper Rings. And of course, I still can’t stop listening to this song.

  • I went to Bar Sardine for the first time and here’s what I didn’t like: the seating is wildly uncomfortable (stool seating? in 2019? pick it up, industry), the food was extremely decent but overpriced and the waitstaff (at least our waiter) was too pushy. Yes, the burger was good (I mean, what burger isn’t?), but for $17? Eat me. No. What are we doing here.

  • Also went to The Happiest Hour and passssssss. I’m so sick of this trend of TINY ASS BURGERS costing more than $15. Fucking done with it. I’m THIS CLOSE in vowing to never eat a restaurant burger again and just get Shake Shack instead. So sick of this shit.

  • I made my autumn list of things I want to do!

Some things that I’m looking forward to this month: new Big Mouth episodes on the 4th, I might take a day trip out to Sleepy Hollow, I plan to decorate, I’d really love to have an autumn party (and make use of this great punch bowl idea), think of Baby Dog’s Halloween costume, I’ll definitely watch a few of these, I may partake in the Pumpkin Float, I’m intending on doing my 31-days-of-Halloween celebration yet again (which means that I’ll try to do at least one spookily themed thing each day), and I cannot wait for the return of Riverdale (!) on the 9th.

68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f4b63796d325645506a45523052773d3d2d3434353034373433322e313464343034643163316638323364303335373433393238323133312e676966.gif

Helloooooooo October, get your spooky ass in my bed.

giphy.gif

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in August over here!